Maupassant Original Short Stories Vol. 13
GUY DE MAUPASSANT
ORIGINAL SHORT STORIES
ALBERT M. C. McMASTER, B.A.
A. E. HENDERSON, B.A.
MME. QUESADA and Others
THE LITTLE CASK
THE ENGLISHMAN OF ETRETAT
A FATHER'S CONFESSION
A MOTHER OF MONSTERS
AN UNCOMFORTABLE BED
THE MOUNTAIN POOL
THE MAGIC COUCH
This entire stretch of country was amazing; it was characterized by a
grandeur that was almost religious, and yet it had an air of sinister
A great, wild lake, filled with stagnant, black water, in which thousands
of reeds were waving to and fro, lay in the midst of a vast circle of
naked hills, where nothing grew but broom, or here and there an oak
curiously twisted by the wind.
Just one house stood on the banks of that dark lake, a small, low house
inhabited by Uncle Joseph, an old boatman, who lived on what he could
make by his fishing. Once a week he carried the fish he caught into the
surrounding villages, returning with the few provisions that he needed
for his sustenance.
I went to see this old hermit, who offered to take me with him to his
nets, and I accepted.
His boat was old, worm-eaten and clumsy, and the skinny old man rowed
with a gentle and monotonous stroke that was soothing to the soul,
already oppressed by the sadness of the land round about.
It seemed to me as if I were transported to olden times, in the midst of
that ancient country, in that primitive boat, which was propelled by a
man of another age.
He took up his nets and threw the fish into the bottom of the boat, as
the fishermen of the Bible might have done. Then he took me down to the
end of the lake, where I suddenly perceived a ruin on the other side of
the bank a dilapidated hut, with an enormous red cross on the wall that
looked as if it might have been traced with blood, as it gleamed in the
last rays of the setting sun.
"What is that?" I asked.
"That is where Judas died," the man replied, crossing himself.
I was not surprised, being almost prepared for this strange answer.
Still I asked:
"Judas? What Judas?"
"The Wandering Jew, monsieur," he added.
I asked him to tell me this legend.
But it was better than a legend, being a true story, and quite a recent
one, since Uncle Joseph had known the man.
This hut had formerly been occupied by a large woman, a kind of beggar,
who lived on public charity.
Uncle Joseph did not remember from whom she had this hut. One evening an
old man with a white beard, who seemed to be at least two hundred years
old, and who could hardly drag himself along, asked alms of this forlorn
woman, as he passed her dwelling.
"Sit down, father," she replied; "everything here belongs to all the
world, since it comes from all the world."
He sat down on a stone before the door. He shared the woman's bread, her
bed of leaves, and her house.
He did not leave her again, for he had come to the end of his travels.
"It was Our Lady the Virgin who permitted this, monsieur," Joseph added,
"it being a woman who had opened her door to a Judas, for this old
vagabond was the Wandering Jew. It was not known at first in the country,
but the people suspected it very soon, because he was always walking; it
had become a sort of second nature to him."
And suspicion had been aroused by still another thing. This woman, who
kept that stranger with her, was thought to be a Jewess, for no one had
ever seen her at church. For ten miles around no one ever called her
anything else but the Jewess.
When the little country children saw her come to beg they cried out:
"Mamma, mamma, here is the Jewess!"
The old man and she began to go out together into the neighboring
districts, holding out their hands at all the doors, stammering
supplications into the ears of all the passers. They could be seen at all
hours of the day, on by-paths, in the villages, or again eating bread,
sitting in the noon heat under the shadow of some solitary tree. And the
country people began to call the beggar Old Judas.
One day he brought home in his sack two little live pigs, which a farmer
had given him after he had cured the farmer of some sickness.
Soon he stopped begging, and devoted himself entirely to his pigs. He
took them out to feed by the lake, or under isolated oaks, or in the
near-by valleys. The woman, however, went about all day begging, but she
always came back to him in the evening.
He also did not go to church, and no one ever had seen him cross himself
before the wayside crucifixes. All this gave rise to much gossip:
One night his companion was attacked by a fever and began to tremble like
a leaf in the wind. He went to the nearest town to get some medicine, and
then he shut himself up with her, and was not seen for six days.
The priest, having heard that the "Jewess" was about to die, came to
offer the consolation of his religion and administer the last sacrament.
Was she a Jewess? He did not know. But in any case, he wished to try to
save her soul.
Hardly had he knocked at the door when old Judas appeared on the
threshold, breathing hard, his eyes aflame, his long beard agitated, like
rippling water, and he hurled blasphemies in an unknown language,
extending his skinny arms in order to prevent the priest from entering.
The priest attempted to speak, offered his purse and his aid, but the old
man kept on abusing him, making gestures with his hands as if throwing;
stones at him.
Then the priest retired, followed by the curses of the beggar.
The companion of old Judas died the following day. He buried her himself,
in front of her door. They were people of so little account that no one
took any interest in them.
Then they saw the man take his pigs out again to the lake and up the
hillsides. And he also began begging again to get food. But the people
gave him hardly anything, as there was so much gossip about him. Every
one knew, moreover, how he had treated the priest.
Then he disappeared. That was during Holy Week, but no one paid any
attention to him.
But on Easter Sunday the boys and girls who had gone walking out to the
lake heard a great noise in the hut. The door was locked; but the boys
broke it in, and the two pigs ran out, jumping like gnats. No one ever
saw them again.
The whole crowd went in; they saw some old rags on the floor, the
beggar's hat, some bones, clots of dried blood and bits of flesh in the
hollows of the skull.
His pigs had devoured him.
"This happened on Good Friday, monsieur." Joseph concluded his story,
"three hours after noon."
"How do you know that?" I asked him.
"There is no doubt about that," he replied.
I did not attempt to make him understand that it could easily happen that
the famished animals had eaten their master, after he had died suddenly
in his hut.
As for the cross on the wall, it had appeared one morning, and no one
knew what hand traced it in that strange color.
Since then no one doubted any longer that the Wandering Jew had died on
I myself believed it for one hour.
THE LITTLE CASK
He was a tall man of forty or thereabout, this Jules Chicot, the
innkeeper of Spreville, with a red face and a round stomach, and said by
those who knew him to be a smart business man. He stopped his buggy in
front of Mother Magloire's farmhouse, and, hitching the horse to the
gatepost, went in at the gate.
Chicot owned some land adjoining that of the old woman, which he had been
coveting for a long while, and had tried in vain to buy a score of times,
but she had always obstinately refused to part with it.
"I was born here, and here I mean to die," was all she said.
He found her peeling potatoes outside the farmhouse door. She was a woman
of about seventy-two, very thin, shriveled and wrinkled, almost dried up
in fact and much bent but as active and untiring as a girl. Chicot patted
her on the back in a friendly fashion and then sat down by her on a
"Well mother, you are always pretty well and hearty, I am glad to see."
"Nothing to complain of, considering, thank you. And how are you,
"Oh, pretty well, thank you, except a few rheumatic pains occasionally;
otherwise I have nothing to complain of."
"So much the better."
And she said no more, while Chicot watched her going on with her work.
Her crooked, knotted fingers, hard as a lobster's claws, seized the
tubers, which were lying in a pail, as if they had been a pair of
pincers, and she peeled them rapidly, cutting off long strips of skin
with an old knife which she held in the other hand, throwing the potatoes
into the water as they were done. Three daring fowls jumped one after the
other into her lap, seized a bit of peel and then ran away as fast as
their legs would carry them with it in their beak.
Chicot seemed embarrassed, anxious, with something on the tip of his
tongue which he could not say. At last he said hurriedly:
"Listen, Mother Magloire—"
"Well, what is it?"
"You are quite sure that you do not want to sell your land?"
"Certainly not; you may make up your mind to that. What I have said I
have said, so don't refer to it again."
"Very well; only I think I know of an arrangement that might suit us both
"What is it?"
"Just this. You shall sell it to me and keep it all the same. You don't
understand? Very well, then follow me in what I am going to say."
The old woman left off peeling potatoes and looked at the innkeeper
attentively from under her heavy eyebrows, and he went on:
"Let me explain myself. Every month I will give you a hundred and fifty
francs. You understand me! suppose! Every month I will come and bring you
thirty crowns, and it will not make the slightest difference in your
life—not the very slightest. You will have your own home just as
you have now, need not trouble yourself about me, and will owe me
nothing; all you will have to do will be to take my money. Will that
arrangement suit you?"
He looked at her good-humoredly, one might almost have said benevolently,
and the old woman returned his looks distrustfully, as if she suspected a
trap, and said:
"It seems all right as far as I am concerned, but it will not give you
"Never mind about that," he said; "you may remain here as long as it
pleases God Almighty to let you live; it will be your home. Only you will
sign a deed before a lawyer making it over to me; after your death. You
have no children, only nephews and nieces for whom you don't care a
straw. Will that suit you? You will keep everything during your life, and
I will give you the thirty crowns a month. It is pure gain as far as you
The old woman was surprised, rather uneasy, but, nevertheless, very much
tempted to agree, and answered:
"I don't say that I will not agree to it, but I must think about it. Come
back in a week, and we will talk it over again, and I will then give you
my definite answer."
And Chicot went off as happy as a king who had conquered an empire.
Mother Magloire was thoughtful, and did not sleep at all that night; in
fact, for four days she was in a fever of hesitation. She suspected that
there was something underneath the offer which was not to her advantage;
but then the thought of thirty crowns a month, of all those coins
clinking in her apron, falling to her, as it were, from the skies,
without her doing anything for it, aroused her covetousness.
She went to the notary and told him about it. He advised her to accept
Chicot's offer, but said she ought to ask for an annuity of fifty instead
of thirty, as her farm was worth sixty thousand francs at the lowest
"If you live for fifteen years longer," he said, "even then he will only
have paid forty-five thousand francs for it."
The old woman trembled with joy at this prospect of getting fifty crowns
a month, but she was still suspicious, fearing some trick, and she
remained a long time with the lawyer asking questions without being able
to make up her mind to go. At last she gave him instructions to draw up
the deed and returned home with her head in a whirl, just as if she had
drunk four jugs of new cider.
When Chicot came again to receive her answer she declared, after a lot of
persuading, that she could not make up her mind to agree to his proposal,
though she was all the time trembling lest he should not consent to give
the fifty crowns, but at last, when he grew urgent, she told him what she
expected for her farm.
He looked surprised and disappointed and refused.
Then, in order to convince him, she began to talk about the probable
duration of her life.
"I am certainly not likely to live more than five or six years longer. I
am nearly seventy-three, and far from strong, even considering my age.
The other evening I thought I was going to die, and could hardly manage
to crawl into bed."
But Chicot was not going to be taken in.
"Come, come, old lady, you are as strong as the church tower, and will
live till you are a hundred at least; you will no doubt see me put under
The whole day was spent in discussing the money, and as the old woman
would not give in, the innkeeper consented to give the fifty crowns, and
she insisted upon having ten crowns over and above to strike the bargain.
Three years passed and the old dame did not seem to have grown a day
older. Chicot was in despair, and it seemed to him as if he had been
paying that annuity for fifty years, that he had been taken in, done,
ruined. From time to time he went to see the old lady, just as one goes
in July to see when the harvest is likely to begin. She always met him
with a cunning look, and one might have supposed that she was
congratulating herself on the trick she had played him. Seeing how well
and hearty she seemed he very soon got into his buggy again, growling to
"Will you never die, you old hag?"
He did not know what to do, and he felt inclined to strangle her when he
saw her. He hated her with a ferocious, cunning hatred, the hatred of a
peasant who has been robbed, and began to cast about for some means of
getting rid of her.
One day he came to see her again, rubbing his hands as he did the first
time he proposed the bargain, and, after having chatted for a few
minutes, he said:
"Why do you never come and have a bit of dinner at my place when you are
in Spreville? The people are talking about it, and saying we are not on
friendly terms, and that pains me. You know it will cost you nothing if
you come, for I don't look at the price of a dinner. Come whenever you
feel inclined; I shall be very glad to see you."
Old Mother Magloire did not need to be asked twice, and the next day but
one, as she had to go to the town in any case, it being market day, she
let her man drive her to Chicot's place, where the buggy was put in the
barn while she went into the house to get her dinner.
The innkeeper was delighted and treated her like a lady, giving her roast
fowl, black pudding, leg of mutton and bacon and cabbage. But she ate
next to nothing. She had always been a small eater, and had generally
lived on a little soup and a crust of bread and butter.
Chicot was disappointed and pressed her to eat more, but she refused, and
she would drink little, and declined coffee, so he asked her:
"But surely you will take a little drop of brandy or liqueur?"
"Well, as to that, I don't know that I will refuse." Whereupon he shouted
"Rosalie, bring the superfine brandy—the special—you know."
The servant appeared, carrying a long bottle ornamented with a paper
vine-leaf, and he filled two liqueur glasses.
"Just try that; you will find it first rate."
The good woman drank it slowly in sips, so as to make the pleasure last
all the longer, and when she had finished her glass, she said:
"Yes, that is first rate!"
Almost before she had said it Chicot had poured her out another glassful.
She wished to refuse, but it was too late, and she drank it very slowly,
as she had done the first, and he asked her to have a third. She
objected, but he persisted.
"It is as mild as milk, you know; I can drink ten or a dozen glasses
without any ill effects; it goes down like sugar and does not go to the
head; one would think that it evaporated on the tongue: It is the most
wholesome thing you can drink."
She took it, for she really enjoyed it, but she left half the glass.
Then Chicot, in an excess of generosity, said:
"Look here, as it is so much to your taste, I will give you a small keg
of it, just to show that you and I are still excellent friends." So she
took one away with her, feeling slightly overcome by the effects of what
she had drunk.
The next day the innkeeper drove into her yard and took a little
iron-hooped keg out of his gig. He insisted on her tasting the contents,
to make sure it was the same delicious article, and, when they had each
of them drunk three more glasses, he said as he was going away:
"Well, you know when it is all gone there is more left; don't be modest,
for I shall not mind. The sooner it is finished the better pleased I
Four days later he came again. The old woman was outside her door cutting
up the bread for her soup.
He went up to her and put his face close to hers, so that he might smell
her breath; and when he smelt the alcohol he felt pleased.
"I suppose you will give me a glass of the Special?" he said. And they
had three glasses each.
Soon, however, it began to be whispered abroad that Mother Magloire was
in the habit of getting drunk all by herself. She was picked up in her
kitchen, then in her yard, then in the roads in the neighborhood, and she
was often brought home like a log.
The innkeeper did not go near her any more, and, when people spoke to him
about her, he used to say, putting on a distressed look:
"It is a great pity that she should have taken to drink at her age, but
when people get old there is no remedy. It will be the death of her in
the long run."
And it certainly was the death of her. She died the next winter. About
Christmas time she fell down, unconscious, in the snow, and was found
dead the next morning.
And when Chicot came in for the farm, he said:
"It was very stupid of her; if she had not taken to drink she would
probably have lived ten years longer."
Father Boitelle (Antoine) made a specialty of undertaking dirty jobs all
through the countryside. Whenever there was a ditch or a cesspool to be
cleaned out, a dunghill removed, a sewer cleansed, or any dirt hole
whatever, he way always employed to do it.
He would come with the instruments of his trade, his sabots covered with
dirt, and set to work, complaining incessantly about his occupation. When
people asked him then why he did this loathsome work, he would reply
"Faith, 'tis for my children, whom I must support. This brings me in more
than anything else."
He had, indeed, fourteen children. If any one asked him what had become
of them, he would say with an air of indifference:
"There are only eight of them left in the house. One is out at service
and five are married."
When the questioner wanted to know whether they were well married, he
"I did not oppose them. I opposed them in nothing. They married just as
they pleased. We shouldn't go against people's likings, it turns out
badly. I am a night scavenger because my parents went against my likings.
But for that I would have become a workman like the others."
Here is the way his parents had thwarted him in his likings:
He was at the time a soldier stationed at Havre, not more stupid than
another, or sharper either, a rather simple fellow, however. When he was
not on duty, his greatest pleasure was to walk along the quay, where the
bird dealers congregate. Sometimes alone, sometimes with a soldier from
his own part of the country, he would slowly saunter along by cages
containing parrots with green backs and yellow heads from the banks of
the Amazon, or parrots with gray backs and red heads from Senegal, or
enormous macaws, which look like birds reared in hot-houses, with their
flower-like feathers, their plumes and their tufts. Parrots of every
size, who seem painted with minute care by the miniaturist, God Almighty,
and the little birds, all the smaller birds hopped about, yellow, blue
and variegated, mingling their cries with the noise of the quay; and
adding to the din caused by unloading the vessels, as well as by
passengers and vehicles, a violent clamor, loud, shrill and deafening, as
if from some distant forest of monsters.
Boitelle would pause, with wondering eyes, wide-open mouth, laughing and
enraptured, showing his teeth to the captive cockatoos, who kept nodding
their white or yellow topknots toward the glaring red of his breeches and
the copper buckle of his belt. When he found a bird that could talk he
put questions to it, and if it happened at the time to be disposed to
reply and to hold a conversation with him he would carry away enough
amusement to last him till evening. He also found heaps of amusement in
looking at the monkeys, and could conceive no greater luxury for a rich
man than to own these animals as one owns cats and dogs. This kind of
taste for the exotic he had in his blood, as people have a taste for the
chase, or for medicine, or for the priesthood. He could not help
returning to the quay every time the gates of the barracks opened, drawn
toward it by an irresistible longing.
On one occasion, having stopped almost in ecstasy before an enormous
macaw, which was swelling out its plumes, bending forward and bridling up
again as if making the court curtseys of parrot-land, he saw the door of
a little cafe adjoining the bird dealer's shop open, and a young negress
appeared, wearing on her head a red silk handkerchief. She was sweeping
into the street the corks and sand of the establishment.
Boitelle's attention was soon divided between the bird and the woman, and
he really could not tell which of these two beings he contemplated with
the greater astonishment and delight.
The negress, having swept the rubbish into the street, raised her eyes,
and, in her turn, was dazzled by the soldier's uniform. There she stood
facing him with her broom in her hands as if she were bringing him a
rifle, while the macaw continued bowing. But at the end of a few seconds
the soldier began to feel embarrassed at this attention, and he walked
away quietly so as not to look as if he were beating a retreat.
But he came back. Almost every day he passed before the Cafe des
Colonies, and often he could distinguish through the window the figure of
the little black-skinned maid serving "bocks" or glasses of brandy to the
sailors of the port. Frequently, too, she would come out to the door on
seeing him; soon, without even having exchanged a word, they smiled at
one another like acquaintances; and Boitelle felt his heart touched when
he suddenly saw, glittering between the dark lips of the girl, a shining
row of white teeth. At length, one day he ventured to enter, and was
quite surprised to find that she could speak French like every one else.
The bottle of lemonade, of which she was good enough to accept a
glassful, remained in the soldier's recollection memorably delicious, and
it became a custom with him to come and absorb in this little tavern on
the quay all the agreeable drinks which he could afford.
For him it was a treat, a happiness, on which his thoughts dwelt
constantly, to watch the black hand of the little maid pouring something
into his glass while her teeth laughed more than her eyes. At the end of
two months they became fast friends, and Boitelle, after his first
astonishment at discovering that this negress had as good principles as
honest French girls, that she exhibited a regard for economy, industry,
religion and good conduct, loved her more on that account, and was so
charmed with her that he wanted to marry her.
He told her his intentions, which made her dance with joy. She had also a
little money, left her by, a female oyster dealer, who had picked her up
when she had been left on the quay at Havre by an American captain. This
captain had found her, when she was only about six years old, lying on
bales of cotton in the hold of his ship, some hours after his departure
from New York. On his arrival in Havre he abandoned to the care of this
compassionate oyster dealer the little black creature, who had been
hidden on board his vessel, he knew not why or by whom.
The oyster woman having died, the young negress became a servant at the
Antoine Boitelle added: "This will be all right if my parents don't
oppose it. I will never go against them, you understand, never! I'm going
to say a word or two to them the first time I go back to the country."
On the following week, in fact, having obtained twenty-four hours' leave,
he went to see his family, who cultivated a little farm at Tourteville,
He waited till the meal was finished, the hour when the coffee baptized
with brandy makes people more open-hearted, before informing his parents
that he had found a girl who satisfied his tastes, all his tastes, so
completely that there could not exist any other in all the world so
perfectly suited to him.
The old people, on hearing this, immediately assumed a cautious manner
and wanted explanations. He had concealed nothing from them except the
color of her skin.
She was a servant, without much means, but strong, thrifty, clean,
well-conducted and sensible. All these things were better than money
would be in the hands of a bad housewife. Moreover, she had a few sous,
left her by a woman who had reared her, a good number of sous, almost a
little dowry, fifteen hundred francs in the savings bank. The old people,
persuaded by his talk, and relying also on their own judgment, were
gradually weakening, when he came to the delicate point. Laughing in
rather a constrained fashion, he said:
"There's only one thing you may not like. She is not a white slip."
They did not understand, and he had to explain at some length and very
cautiously, to avoid shocking them, that she belonged to the dusky race
of which they had only seen samples in pictures at Epinal. Then they
became restless, perplexed, alarmed, as if he had proposed a union with
The mother said: "Black? How much of her is black? Is the whole of her?"
He replied: "Certainly. Everywhere, just as you are white everywhere."
The father interposed: "Black? Is it as black as the pot?"
The son answered: "Perhaps a little less than that. She is black, but not
disgustingly black. The cure's cassock is black, but it is not uglier
than a surplice which is white."
The father said: "Are there more black people besides her in her
And the son, with an air of conviction, exclaimed: "Certainly!"
But the old man shook his head.
"That must be unpleasant."
And the son:
"It isn't more disagreeable than anything else when you get accustomed to
The mother asked:
"It doesn't soil the underwear more than other skins, this black skin?"
"Not more than your own, as it is her proper color."
Then, after many other questions, it was agreed that the parents should
see this girl before coming; to any decision, and that the young fellow,
whose, term of military service would be over in a month, should bring
her to the house in order that they might examine her and decide by
talking the matter over whether or not she was too dark to enter the
Antoine accordingly announced that on Sunday, the 22d of May, the day of
his discharge, he would start for Tourteville with his sweetheart.
She had put on, for this journey to the house of her lover's parents, her
most beautiful and most gaudy clothes, in which yellow, red and blue were
the prevailing colors, so that she looked as if she were adorned for a
At the terminus, as they were leaving Havre, people stared at her, and
Boitelle was proud of giving his arm to a person who commanded so much
attention. Then, in the third-class carriage, in which she took a seat by
his side, she aroused so much astonishment among the country folks that
the people in the adjoining compartments stood up on their benches to
look at her over the wooden partition which divides the compartments. A
child, at sight of her, began to cry with terror, another concealed his
face in his mother's apron. Everything went off well, however, up to
their arrival at their destination. But when the train slackened its rate
of motion as they drew near Yvetot, Antoine felt: ill at ease, as he
would have done at a review when; he did not know his drill practice.
Then, as he; leaned his head out, he recognized in the distance: his
father, holding the bridle of the horse harnessed to a carryall, and his
mother, who had come forward to the grating, behind which stood those who
were expecting friends.
He alighted first, gave his hand to his sweetheart, and holding himself
erect, as if he were escorting a general, he went to meet his family.
The mother, on seeing this black lady in variegated costume in her son's
company, remained so stupefied that she could not open her mouth; and the
father found it hard to hold the horse, which the engine or the negress
caused to rear continuously. But Antoine, suddenly filled with unmixed
joy at seeing once more the old people, rushed forward with open arms,
embraced his mother, embraced his father, in spite of the nag's fright,
and then turning toward his companion, at whom the passengers on the
platform stopped to stare with amazement, he proceeded to explain:
"Here she is! I told you that, at first sight, she is not attractive; but
as soon as you know her, I can assure you there's not a better sort in
the whole world. Say good-morning to her so that she may not feel badly."
Thereupon Mere Boitelle, almost frightened out of her wits, made a sort
of curtsy, while the father took off his cap, murmuring:
"I wish you good luck!"
Then, without further delay, they climbed into the carryall, the two
women at the back, on seats which made them jump up and down as the
vehicle went jolting along the road, and the two men in front on the
Nobody spoke. Antoine, ill at ease, whistled a barrack-room air; his
father whipped the nag; and his mother, from where she sat in the corner,
kept casting sly glances at the negress, whose forehead and cheekbones
shone in the sunlight like well-polished shoes.
Wishing to break the ice, Antoine turned round.
"Well," said he, "we don't seem inclined to talk."
"We must have time," replied the old woman.
He went on:
"Come! Tell us the little story about that hen of yours that laid eight
It was a funny anecdote of long standing in the family. But, as his
mother still remained silent, paralyzed by her emotion, he undertook
himself to tell the story, laughing as he did so at the memorable
incident. The father, who knew it by heart brightened at the opening
words of the narrative; his wife soon followed his example; and the
negress herself, when he reached the drollest part of it, suddenly gave
vent to a laugh, such a loud, rolling torrent of laughter that the horse,
becoming excited, broke into a gallop for a while.
This served to cement their acquaintance. They all began to chat.
They had scarcely reached the house and had all alighted, when Antoine
conducted his sweetheart to a room, so that she might take off her dress,
to avoid staining it, as she was going to prepare a nice dish, intended
to win the old people's affections through their stomachs. He drew his
parents outside the house, and, with beating heart, asked:
"Well, what do you say now?"
The father said nothing. The mother, less timid, exclaimed:
"She is too black. No, indeed, this is too much for me. It turns my
"You will get used to it," said Antoine.
"Perhaps so, but not at first."
They went into the house, where the good woman was somewhat affected at
the spectacle of the negress engaged in cooking. She at once proceeded to
assist her, with petticoats tucked up, active in spite of her age.
The meal was an excellent one, very long, very enjoyable. When they were
taking a turn after dinner, Antoine took his father aside.
"Well, dad, what do you say about it?"
The peasant took care never to compromise himself.
"I have no opinion about it. Ask your mother."
So Antoine went back to his mother, and, detaining her behind the rest,
"Well, mother, what do you think of her?"
"My poor lad, she is really too black. If she were only a little less
black, I would not go against you, but this is too much. One would think
it was Satan!"
He did not press her, knowing how obstinate the old woman had always
been, but he felt a tempest of disappointment sweeping over his heart. He
was turning over in his mind what he ought to do, what plan he could
devise, surprised, moreover, that she had not conquered them already as
she had captivated himself. And they, all four, walked along through the
wheat fields, having gradually relapsed into silence. Whenever they
passed a fence they saw a countryman sitting on the stile, and a group of
brats climbed up to stare at them, and every one rushed out into the road
to see the "black" whore young Boitelle had brought home with him. At a
distance they noticed people scampering across the fields just as when
the drum beats to draw public attention to some living phenomenon. Pere
and Mere Boitelle, alarmed at this curiosity, which was exhibited
everywhere through the country at their approach, quickened their pace,
walking side by side, and leaving their son far behind. His dark
companion asked what his parents thought of her.
He hesitatingly replied that they had not yet made up their minds.
But on the village green people rushed out of all the houses in a flutter
of excitement; and, at the sight of the gathering crowd, old Boitelle
took to his heels, and regained his abode, while Antoine; swelling with
rage, his sweetheart on his arm, advanced majestically under the staring
eyes, which opened wide in amazement.
He understood that it was at an end, and there was no hope for him, that
he could not marry his negress. She also understood it; and as they drew
near the farmhouse they both began to weep. As soon as they had got back
to the house, she once more took off her dress to aid the mother in the
household duties, and followed her everywhere, to the dairy, to the
stable, to the hen house, taking on herself the hardest part of the work,
repeating always: "Let me do it, Madame Boitelle," so that, when night
came on, the old woman, touched but inexorable, said to her son: "She is
a good girl, all the same. It's a pity she is so black; but indeed she is
too black. I could not get used to it. She must go back again. She is
too, too black!"
And young Boitelle said to his sweetheart:
"She will not consent. She thinks you are too black. You must go back
again. I will go with you to the train. No matter—don't fret. I am
going to talk to them after you have started."
He then took her to the railway station, still cheering her with hope,
and, when he had kissed her, he put her into the train, which he watched
as it passed out of sight, his eyes swollen with tears.
In vain did he appeal to the old people. They would never give their
And when he had told this story, which was known all over the country,
Antoine Boitelle would always add:
"From that time forward I have had no heart for anything—for
anything at all. No trade suited me any longer, and so I became what I
am—a night scavenger."
People would say to him:
"Yet you got married."
"Yes, and I can't say that my wife didn't please me, seeing that I have
fourteen children; but she is not the other one, oh, no—certainly
not! The other one, mark you, my negress, she had only to give me one
glance, and I felt as if I were in Heaven."
This story was told during the hunting season at the Chateau Baneville.
The autumn had been rainy and sad. The red leaves, instead of rustling
under the feet, were rotting under the heavy downfalls.
The forest was as damp as it could be. From it came an odor of must, of
rain, of soaked grass and wet earth; and the sportsmen, their backs
hunched under the downpour, mournful dogs, with tails between their legs
and hairs sticking to their sides, and the young women, with their
clothes drenched, returned every evening, tired in body and in mind.
After dinner, in the large drawing-room, everybody played lotto, without
enjoyment, while the wind whistled madly around the house. Then they
tried telling stories like those they read in books, but no one was able
to invent anything amusing. The hunters told tales of wonderful shots and
of the butchery of rabbits; and the women racked their brains for ideas
without revealing the imagination of Scheherezade. They were about to
give up this diversion when a young woman, who was idly caressing the
hand of an old maiden aunt, noticed a little ring made of blond hair,
which she had often seen, without paying any attention to it.
She fingered it gently and asked, "Auntie, what is this ring? It looks as
if it were made from the hair of a child."
The old lady blushed, grew pale, then answered in a trembling voice: "It
is sad, so sad that I never wish to speak of it. All the unhappiness of
my life comes from that. I was very young then, and the memory has
remained so painful that I weep every time I think of it."
Immediately everybody wished to know the story, but the old lady refused
to tell it. Finally, after they had coaxed her for a long time, she
yielded. Here is the story:
"You have often heard me speak of the Santeze family, now extinct. I knew
the last three male members of this family. They all died in the same
manner; this hair belongs to the last one. He was thirteen when he killed
himself for me. That seems strange to you, doesn't it?
"Oh! it was a strange family—mad, if you will, but a charming
madness, the madness of love. From father to son, all had violent
passions which filled their whole being, which impelled them to do wild
things, drove them to frantic enthusiasm, even to crime. This was born in
them, just as burning devotion is in certain souls. Trappers have not the
same nature as minions of the drawing-room. There was a saying: 'As
passionate as a Santeze.' This could be noticed by looking at them. They
all had wavy hair, falling over their brows, curly beards and large eyes
whose glance pierced and moved one, though one could not say why.
"The grandfather of the owner of this hair, of whom it is the last
souvenir, after many adventures, duels and elopements, at about
sixty-five fell madly in love with his farmer's daughter. I knew them
both. She was blond, pale, distinguished-looking, with a slow manner of
talking, a quiet voice and a look so gentle that one might have taken her
for a Madonna. The old nobleman took her to his home and was soon so
captivated with her that he could not live without her for a minute. His
daughter and daughter-in-law, who lived in the chateau, found this
perfectly natural, love was such a tradition in the family. Nothing in
regard to a passion surprised them, and if one spoke before them of
parted lovers, even of vengeance after treachery, both said in the same
sad tone: 'Oh, how he must have suffered to come to that point!' That was
all. They grew sad over tragedies of love, but never indignant, even when
they were criminal.
"Now, one day a young man named Monsieur de Gradelle, who had been
invited for the shooting, eloped with the young girl.
"Monsieur de Santeze remained calm as if nothing had happened, but one
morning he was found hanging in the kennels, among his dogs.
"His son died in the same manner in a hotel in Paris during a journey
which he made there in 1841, after being deceived by a singer from the
"He left a twelve-year-old child and a widow, my mother's sister. She
came to my father's house with the boy, while we were living at
Bertillon. I was then seventeen.
"You have no idea how wonderful and precocious this Santeze child was.
One might have thought that all the tenderness and exaltation of the
whole race had been stored up in this last one. He was always dreaming
and walking about alone in a great alley of elms leading from the chateau
to the forest. I watched from my window this sentimental boy, who walked
with thoughtful steps, his hands behind his back, his head bent, and at
times stopping to raise his eyes as if he could see and understand things
that were not comprehensible at his age.
"Often, after dinner on clear evenings, he would say to me: 'Let us go
outside and dream, cousin.' And we would go outside together in the park.
He would stop quickly before a clearing where the white vapor of the moon
lights the woods, and he would press my hand, saying: 'Look! look! but
you don't understand me; I feel it. If you understood me, we should be
happy. One must love to know! I would laugh and then kiss this child, who
loved me madly.
"Often, after dinner, he would sit on my mother's knees. 'Come, auntie,'
he would say, 'tell me some love-stories.' And my mother, as a joke,
would tell him all the old legends of the family, all the passionate
adventures of his forefathers, for thousands of them were current, some
true and some false. It was their reputation for love and gallantry which
was the ruin of every one of these-men; they gloried in it and then
thought that they had to live up to the renown of their house.
"The little fellow became exalted by these tender or terrible stories,
and at times he would clap his hands, crying: 'I, too, I, too, know how
to love, better than all of them!'
"Then, he began to court me in a timid and tender manner, at which every
one laughed, it was, so amusing. Every morning I had some flowers picked
by him, and every evening before going to his room he would kiss my hand
and murmur: 'I love you!'
"I was guilty, very guilty, and I grieved continually about it, and I
have been doing penance all my life; I have remained an old
maid—or, rather, I have lived as a widowed fiancee, his widow.
"I was amused at this childish tenderness, and I even encouraged him. I
was coquettish, as charming as with a man, alternately caressing and
severe. I maddened this child. It was a game for me and a joyous
diversion for his mother and mine. He was twelve! think of it! Who would
have taken this atom's passion seriously? I kissed him as often as he
wished; I even wrote him little notes, which were read by our respective
mothers; and he answered me by passionate letters, which I have kept.
Judging himself as a man, he thought that our loving intimacy was secret.
We had forgotten that he was a Santeze.
"This lasted for about a year. One evening in the park he fell at my feet
and, as he madly kissed the hem of my dress, he kept repeating: 'I love
you! I love you! I love you! If ever you deceive me, if ever you leave me
for another, I'll do as my father did.' And he added in a hoarse voice,
which gave me a shiver: 'You know what he did!'
"I stood there astonished. He arose, and standing on the tips of his toes
in order to reach my ear, for I was taller than he, he pronounced my
first name: 'Genevieve!' in such a gentle, sweet, tender tone that I
trembled all over. I stammered: 'Let us return! let us return!' He said
no more and followed me; but as we were going up the steps of the porch,
he stopped me, saying: 'You know, if ever you leave me, I'll kill
"This time I understood that I had gone too far, and I became quite
reserved. One day, as he was reproaching me for this, I answered: 'You
are now too old for jesting and too young for serious love. I'll wait.'
"I thought that this would end the matter. In the autumn he was sent to a
boarding-school. When he returned the following summer I was engaged to
be married. He understood immediately, and for a week he became so
pensive that I was quite anxious.
"On the morning of the ninth day I saw a little paper under my door as I
got up. I seized it, opened it and read: 'You have deserted me and you
know what I said. It is death to which you have condemned me. As I do not
wish to be found by another than you, come to the park just where I told
you last year that I loved you and look in the air.'
"I thought that I should go mad. I dressed as quickly as I could and ran
wildly to the place that he had mentioned. His little cap was on the
ground in the mud. It had been raining all night. I raised my eyes and
saw something swinging among the leaves, for the wind was blowing a gale.
"I don't know what I did after that. I must have screamed at first, then
fainted and fallen, and finally have run to the chateau. The next thing
that I remember I was in bed, with my mother sitting beside me.
"I thought that I had dreamed all this in a frightful nightmare. I
stammered: 'And what of him, what of him, Gontran?' There was no answer.
It was true!
"I did not dare see him again, but I asked for a lock of his blond hair.
Here—here it is!"
And the old maid stretched out her trembling hand in a despairing
gesture. Then she blew her nose several times, wiped her eyes and
"I broke off my marriage—without saying why. And I—I always
have remained the—the widow of this thirteen-year-old boy." Then
her head fell on her breast and she wept for a long time.
As the guests were retiring for the night a large man, whose quiet she
had disturbed, whispered in his neighbor's ear: "Isn't it unfortunate to,
be so sentimental?"
THE ENGLISHMAN OF ETRETAT
A great English poet has just crossed over to France in order to greet
Victor Hugo. All the newspapers are full of his name and he is the great
topic of conversation in all drawing-rooms. Fifteen years ago I had
occasion several times to meet Algernon Charles Swinburne. I will attempt
to show him just as I saw him and to give an idea of the strange
impression he made on me, which will remain with me throughout time.
I believe it was in 1867 or in 1868 that an unknown young Englishman came
to Etretat and bought a little but hidden under great trees. It was said
that he lived there, always alone, in a strange manner; and he aroused
the inimical surprise of the natives, for the inhabitants were sullen and
foolishly malicious, as they always are in little towns.
They declared that this whimsical Englishman ate nothing but boiled.
roasted or stewed monkey; that he would see no one; that he talked to
himself hours at a time and many other surprising things that made people
think that he was different from other men. They were surprised that he
should live alone with a monkey. Had it been a cat or a dog they would
have said nothing. But a monkey! Was that not frightful? What savage
tastes the man must have!
I knew this young man only from seeing him in the streets. He was short,
plump, without being fat, mild-looking, and he wore a little blond
mustache, which was almost invisible.
Chance brought us together. This savage had amiable and pleasing manners,
but he was one of those strange Englishmen that one meets here and there
throughout the world.
Endowed with remarkable intelligence, he seemed to live in a fantastic
dream, as Edgar Poe must have lived. He had translated into English a
volume of strange Icelandic legends, which I ardently desired to see
translated into French. He loved the supernatural, the dismal and
grewsome, but he spoke of the most marvellous things with a calmness that
was typically English, to which his gentle and quiet voice gave a
semblance of reality that was maddening.
Full of a haughty disdain for the world, with its conventions, prejudices
and code of morality, he had nailed to his house a name that was boldly
impudent. The keeper of a lonely inn who should write on his door:
"Travellers murdered here!" could not make a more sinister jest. I never
had entered his dwelling, when one day I received an invitation to
luncheon, following an accident that had occurred to one of his friends,
who had been almost drowned and whom I had attempted to rescue.
Although I was unable to reach the man until he had already been rescued,
I received the hearty thanks of the two Englishmen, and the following day
I called upon them.
The friend was a man about thirty years old. He bore an enormous head on
a child's body—a body without chest or shoulders. An immense
forehead, which seemed to have engulfed the rest of the man, expanded
like a dome above a thin face which ended in a little pointed beard. Two
sharp eyes and a peculiar mouth gave one the impression of the head of a
reptile, while the magnificent brow suggested a genius.
A nervous twitching shook this peculiar being, who walked, moved, acted
by jerks like a broken spring.
This was Algernon Charles Swinburne, son of an English admiral and
grandson, on the maternal side, of the Earl of Ashburnham.
He strange countenance was transfigured when he spoke. I have seldom seen
a man more impressive, more eloquent, incisive or charming in
conversation. His rapid, clear, piercing and fantastic imagination seemed
to creep into his voice and to lend life to his words. His brusque
gestures enlivened his speech, which penetrated one like a dagger, and he
had bursts of thought, just as lighthouses throw out flashes of fire,
great, genial lights that seemed to illuminate a whole world of ideas.
The home of the two friends was pretty and by no means commonplace.
Everywhere were paintings, some superb, some strange, representing
different conceptions of insanity. Unless I am mistaken, there was a
water-color which represented the head of a dead man floating in a
rose-colored shell on a boundless ocean, under a moon with a human face.
Here and there I came across bones. I clearly remember a flayed hand on
which was hanging some dried skin and black muscles, and on the
snow-white bones could be seen the traces of dried blood.
The food was a riddle which I could not solve. Was it good? Was it bad? I
could not say. Some roast monkey took away all desire to make a steady
diet of this animal, and the great monkey who roamed about among us at
large and playfully pushed his head into my glass when I wished to drink
cured me of any desire I might have to take one of his brothers as a
companion for the rest of my days.
As for the two men, they gave me the impression of two strange, original,
remarkable minds, belonging to that peculiar race of talented madmen from
among whom have arisen Poe, Hoffmann and many others.
If genius is, as is commonly believed, a sort of aberration of great
minds, then Algernon Charles Swinburne is undoubtedly a genius.
Great minds that are healthy are never considered geniuses, while this
sublime qualification is lavished on brains that are often inferior but
are slightly touched by madness.
At any rate, this poet remains one of the first of his time, through his
originality and polished form. He is an exalted lyrical singer who seldom
bothers about the good and humble truth, which French poets are now
seeking so persistently and patiently. He strives to set down dreams,
subtle thoughts, sometimes great, sometimes visibly forced, but sometimes
Two years later I found the house closed and its tenants gone. The
furniture was being sold. In memory of them I bought the hideous flayed
hand. On the grass an enormous square block of granite bore this simple
word: "Nip." Above this a hollow stone offered water to the birds. It was
the grave of the monkey, who had been hanged by a young, vindictive negro
servant. It was said that this violent domestic had been forced to flee
at the point of his exasperated master's revolver. After wandering about
without home or food for several days, he returned and began to peddle
barley-sugar in the streets. He was expelled from the country after he
had almost strangled a displeased customer.
The world would be gayer if one could often meet homes like that.
This story appeared in the "Gaulois," November 29, 1882. It was the
original sketch for the introductory study of Swinburne, written by
Maupassant for the French translation by Gabriel Mourey of "Poems
It was a men's dinner party, and they were sitting over their cigars and
brandy and discussing magnetism. Donato's tricks and Charcot's
experiments. Presently, the sceptical, easy-going men, who cared nothing
for religion of any sort, began telling stories of strange occurrences,
incredible things which, nevertheless, had really occurred, so they said,
falling back into superstitious beliefs, clinging to these last remnants
of the marvellous, becoming devotees of this mystery of magnetism,
defending it in the name of science. There was only one person who
smiled, a vigorous young fellow, a great ladies' man who was so
incredulous that he would not even enter upon a discussion of such
He repeated with a sneer:
"Humbug! humbug! humbug! We need not discuss Donato, who is merely a very
smart juggler. As for M. Charcot, who is said to be a remarkable man of
science, he produces on me the effect of those story-tellers of the
school of Edgar Poe, who end by going mad through constantly reflecting
on queer cases of insanity. He has authenticated some cases of
unexplained and inexplicable nervous phenomena; he makes his way into
that unknown region which men are exploring every day, and unable always
to understand what he sees, he recalls, perhaps, the ecclesiastical
interpretation of these mysteries. I should like to hear what he says
The words of the unbeliever were listened to with a kind of pity, as if
he had blasphemed in an assembly of monks.
One of these gentlemen exclaimed:
"And yet miracles were performed in olden times."
"I deny it," replied the other: "Why cannot they be performed now?"
Then, each mentioned some fact, some fantastic presentiment some instance
of souls communicating with each other across space, or some case of the
secret influence of one being over another. They asserted and maintained
that these things had actually occurred, while the sceptic angrily
"Humbug! humbug! humbug!"
At last he rose, threw away his cigar, and with his hands in his pockets,
said: "Well, I also have two stories to tell you, which I will afterwards
explain. Here they are:
"In the little village of Etretat, the men, who are all seafaring folk,
go every year to Newfoundland to fish for cod. One night the little son
of one of these fishermen woke up with a start, crying out that his
father was dead. The child was quieted, and again he woke up exclaiming
that his father was drowned. A month later the news came that his father
had, in fact, been swept off the deck of his smack by a billow. The widow
then remembered how her son had woke up and spoken of his father's death.
Everyone said it was a miracle, and the affair caused a great sensation.
The dates were compared, and it was found that the accident and the dream
were almost coincident, whence they concluded that they had happened on
the same night and at the same hour. And there is a mystery of
The story-teller stopped suddenly.
Thereupon, one of those who had heard him, much affected by the
"And can you explain this?"
"Perfectly, monsieur. I have discovered the secret. The circumstance
surprised me and even perplexed me very much; but you see, I do not
believe on principle. Just as others begin by believing, I begin by
doubting; and when I cannot understand, I continue to deny that there can
be any telepathic communication between souls; certain that my own
intelligence will be able to explain it. Well, I kept on inquiring into
the matter, and by dint of questioning all the wives of the absent
seamen, I was convinced that not a week passed without one of them, or
one of their children dreaming and declaring when they woke up that the
father was drowned. The horrible and continual fear of this accident
makes them always talk about it. Now, if one of these frequent
predictions coincides, by a very simple chance, with the death of the
person referred to, people at once declare it to be a miracle; for they
suddenly lose sight of all the other predictions of misfortune that have
remained unfulfilled. I have myself known fifty cases where the persons
who made the prediction forgot all about it a week after wards. But, if,
then one happens to die, then the recollection of the thing is
immediately revived, and people are ready to believe in the intervention
of God, according to some, and magnetism, according to others."
One of the smokers remarked:
"What you say is right enough; but what about your second story?"
"Oh! my second story is a very delicate matter to relate. It happened to
myself, and so I don't place any great value on my own view of the
matter. An interested party can never give an impartial opinion. However,
here it is:
"Among my acquaintances was a young woman on whom I had never bestowed a
thought, whom I had never even looked at attentively, never taken any
"I classed her among the women of no importance, though she was not
bad-looking; she appeared, in fact, to possess eyes, a nose, a mouth,
some sort of hair—just a colorless type of countenance. She was one
of those beings who awaken only a chance, passing thought, but no special
interest, no desire.
"Well, one night, as I was writing some letters by my fireside before
going to bed, I was conscious, in the midst of that train of sensuous
visions that sometimes pass through one's brain in moments of idle
reverie, of a kind of slight influence, passing over me, a little flutter
of the heart, and immediately, without any cause, without any logical
connection of thought, I saw distinctly, as if I were touching her, saw
from head to foot, and disrobed, this young woman to whom I had never
given more that three seconds' thought at a time. I suddenly discovered
in her a number of qualities which I had never before observed, a sweet
charm, a languorous fascination; she awakened in me that sort of restless
emotion that causes one to pursue a woman. But I did not think of her
long. I went to bed and was soon asleep. And I dreamed.
"You have all had these strange dreams which make you overcome the
impossible, which open to you double-locked doors, unexpected joys,
tightly folded arms?
"Which of us in these troubled, excising, breathless slumbers, has not
held, clasped, embraced with rapture, the woman who occupied his
thoughts? And have you ever noticed what superhuman delight these happy
dreams give us? Into what mad intoxication they cast you! with what
passionate spasms they shake you! and with what infinite, caressing,
penetrating tenderness they fill your heart for her whom you hold clasped
in your arms in that adorable illusion that is so like reality!
"All this I felt with unforgettable violence. This woman was mine, so
much mine that the pleasant warmth of her skin remained in my fingers,
the odor of her skin, in my brain, the taste of her kisses, on my lips,
the sound of her voice lingered in my ears, the touch of her clasp still
clung to me, and the burning charm of her tenderness still gratified my
senses long after the delight but disillusion of my awakening.
"And three times that night I had the same dream.
"When the day dawned she haunted me, possessed me, filled my senses to
such an extent that I was not one second without thinking of her.
"At last, not knowing what to do, I dressed myself and went to call on
her. As I went upstairs to her apartment, I was so overcome by emotion
that I trembled, and my heart beat rapidly.
"I entered the apartment. She rose the moment she heard my name
mentioned; and suddenly our eyes met in a peculiar fixed gaze.
"I sat down. I stammered out some commonplaces which she seemed not to
hear. I did not know what to say or do. Then, abruptly, clasping my arms
round her, my dream was realized so suddenly that I began to doubt
whether I was really awake. We were friends after this for two years."
"What conclusion do you draw from it?" said a voice.
The story-teller seemed to hesitate.
"The conclusion I draw from it—well, by Jove, the conclusion is
that it was just a coincidence! And then—who can tell? Perhaps it
was some glance of hers which I had not noticed and which came back
that night to me through one of those mysterious and unconscious
—recollections that often bring before us things ignored by our own
consciousness, unperceived by our minds!"
"Call it whatever you like," said one of his table companions, when the
story was finished; "but if you don't believe in magnetism after that, my
dear boy, you are an ungrateful fellow!"
A FATHER'S CONFESSION
All Veziers-le-Rethel had followed the funeral procession of M.
Badon-Leremince to the grave, and the last words of the funeral oration
pronounced by the delegate of the district remained in the minds of all:
"He was an honest man, at least!"
An honest man he had been in all the known acts of his life, in his
words, in his examples, his attitude, his behavior, his enterprises, in
the cut of his beard and the shape of his hats. He never had said a word
that did not set an example, never had given an alms without adding a
word of advice, never had extended his hand without appearing to bestow a
He left two children, a boy and a girl. His son was counselor general,
and his daughter, having married a lawyer, M. Poirel de la Voulte, moved
in the best society of Veziers.
They were inconsolable at the death of their father, for they loved him
As soon as the ceremony was over, the son, daughter and son-in-law
returned to the house of mourning, and, shutting themselves in the
library, they opened the will, the seals of which were to be broken by
them alone and only after the coffin had been placed in the ground. This
wish was expressed by a notice on the envelope.
M. Poirel de la Voulte tore open the envelope, in his character of a
lawyer used to such operations, and having adjusted his spectacles, he
read in a monotonous voice, made for reading the details of contracts:
My children, my dear children, I could not sleep the eternal sleep
in peace if I did not make to you from the tomb a confession, the
confession of a crime, remorse for which has ruined my life. Yes,
I committed a crime, a frightful, abominable crime.
I was twenty-six years old, and I had just been called to the bar in
Paris, and was living the life off young men from the provinces who
are stranded in this town without acquaintances, relatives, or
I took a sweetheart. There are beings who cannot live alone. I was
one of those. Solitude fills me with horrible anguish, the solitude
of my room beside my fire in the evening. I feel then as if I were
alone on earth, alone, but surrounded by vague dangers, unknown and
terrible things; and the partition that separates me from my
neighbor, my neighbor whom I do not know, keeps me at as great a
distance from him as the stars that I see through my window. A sort
of fever pervades me, a fever of impatience and of fear, and the
silence of the walls terrifies me. The silence of a room where one
lives alone is so intense and so melancholy It is not only a silence
of the mind; when a piece of furniture cracks a shudder goes through
you for you expect no noise in this melancholy abode.
How many times, nervous and timid from this motionless silence, I
have begun to talk, to repeat words without rhyme or reason, only to
make some sound. My voice at those times sounds so strange that I
am afraid of that, too. Is there anything more dreadful than
talking to one's self in an empty house? One's voice sounds like
that of another, an unknown voice talking aimlessly, to no one, into
the empty air, with no ear to listen to it, for one knows before
they escape into the solitude of the room exactly what words will be
uttered. And when they resound lugubriously in the silence, they
seem no more than an echo, the peculiar echo of words whispered by
My sweetheart was a young girl like other young girls who live in
Paris on wages that are insufficient to keep them. She was gentle,
good, simple. Her parents lived at Poissy. She went to spend
several days with them from time to time.
For a year I lived quietly with her, fully decided to leave her when
I should find some one whom I liked well enough to marry. I would
make a little provision for this one, for it is an understood thing
in our social set that a woman's love should be paid for, in money
if she is poor, in presents if she is rich.
But one day she told me she was enceinte. I was thunderstruck, and
saw in a second that my life would be ruined. I saw the fetter that
I should wear until my death, everywhere, in my future family life,
in my old age, forever; the fetter of a woman bound to my life
through a child; the fetter of the child whom I must bring up, watch
over, protect, while keeping myself unknown to him, and keeping him
hidden from the world.
I was greatly disturbed at this news, and a confused longing, a
criminal desire, surged through my mind; I did not formulate it, but
I felt it in my heart, ready to come to the surface, as if some one
hidden behind a portiere should await the signal to come out. If
some accident might only happen! So many of these little beings die
before they are born!
Oh! I did not wish my sweetheart to die! The poor girl, I loved
her very much! But I wished, possibly, that the child might die
before I saw it.
He was born. I set up housekeeping in my little bachelor apartment,
an imitation home, with a horrible child. He looked like all
children; I did not care for him. Fathers, you see, do not show
affection until later. They have not the instinctive and passionate
tenderness of mothers; their affection has to be awakened gradually,
their mind must become attached by bonds formed each day between
beings that live in each other's society.
A year passed. I now avoided my home, which was too small, where
soiled linen, baby-clothes and stockings the size of gloves were
lying round, where a thousand articles of all descriptions lay on
the furniture, on the arm of an easy-chair, everywhere. I went out
chiefly that I might not hear the child cry, for he cried on the
slightest pretext, when he was bathed, when he was touched, when he
was put to bed, when he was taken up in the morning, incessantly.
I had made a few acquaintances, and I met at a reception the woman
who was to be your mother. I fell in love with her and became
desirous to marry her. I courted her; I asked her parents' consent
to our marriage and it was granted.
I found myself in this dilemma: I must either marry this young girl
whom I adored, having a child already, or else tell the truth and
renounce her, and happiness, my future, everything; for her parents,
who were people of rigid principles, would not give her to me if
I passed a month of horrible anguish, of mortal torture, a month
haunted by a thousand frightful thoughts; and I felt developing in
me a hatred toward my son, toward that little morsel of living,
screaming flesh, who blocked my path, interrupted my life, condemned
me to an existence without hope, without all those vague
expectations that make the charm of youth.
But just then my companion's mother became ill, and I was left alone
with the child.
It was in December, and the weather was terribly cold. What a
My companion had just left. I had dined alone in my little
dining-room and I went gently into the room where the little one was
I sat down in an armchair before the fire. The wind was blowing,
making the windows rattle, a dry, frosty wind; and I saw trough the
window the stars shining with that piercing brightness that they
have on frosty nights.
Then the idea that had obsessed me for a month rose again to the
surface. As soon as I was quiet it came to me and harassed me. It
ate into my mind like a fixed idea, just as cancers must eat into
the flesh. It was there, in my head, in my heart, in my whole body,
it seemed to me; and it swallowed me up as a wild beast might have.
I endeavored to drive it away, to repulse it, to open my mind to
other thoughts, as one opens a window to the fresh morning breeze to
drive out the vitiated air; but I could not drive it from my brain,
not even for a second. I do not know how to express this torture.
It gnawed at my soul, and I felt a frightful pain, a real physical
and moral pain.
My life was ruined! How could I escape from this situation? How
could I draw back, and how could I confess?
And I loved the one who was to become your mother with a mad
passion, which this insurmountable obstacle only aggravated.
A terrible rage was taking possession of me, choking me, a rage that
verged on madness! Surely I was crazy that evening!
The child was sleeping. I got up and looked at it as it slept. It
was he, this abortion, this spawn, this nothing, that condemned me
to irremediable unhappiness!
He was asleep, his mouth open, wrapped in his bed-clothes in a crib
beside my bed, where I could not sleep.
How did I ever do what I did? How do I know? What force urged me
on? What malevolent power took possession of me? Oh! the
temptation to crime came to me without any forewarning. All I
recall is that my heart beat tumultuously. It beat so hard that I
could hear it, as one hears the strokes of a hammer behind a
partition. That is all I can recall—the beating of my heart!
In my head there was a strange confusion, a tumult, a senseless
disorder, a lack of presence of mind. It was one of those hours of
bewilderment and hallucination when a man is neither conscious of
his actions nor able to guide his will.
I gently raised the coverings from the body of the child; I turned
them down to the foot of the crib, and he lay there uncovered and
He did not wake. Then I went toward the window, softly, quite
softly, and I opened it.
A breath of icy air glided in like an assassin; it was so cold that
I drew aside, and the two candles flickered. I remained standing
near the window, not daring to turn round, as if for fear of seeing
what was doing on behind me, and feeling the icy air continually
across my forehead, my cheeks, my hands, the deadly air which kept
streaming in. I stood there a long time.
I was not thinking, I was not reflecting. All at once a little
cough caused me to shudder frightfully from head to foot, a shudder
that I feel still to the roots of my hair. And with a frantic
movement I abruptly closed both sides of the window and, turning
round, ran over to the crib.
He was still asleep, his mouth open, quite naked. I touched his
legs; they were icy cold and I covered them up.
My heart was suddenly touched, grieved, filled with pity,
tenderness, love for this poor innocent being that I had wished to
kill. I kissed his fine, soft hair long and tenderly; then I went
and sat down before the fire.
I reflected with amazement with horror on what I had done, asking
myself whence come those tempests of the soul in which a man loses
all perspective of things, all command over himself and acts as in a
condition of mad intoxication, not knowing whither he is
going—like a vessel in a hurricane.
The child coughed again, and it gave my heart a wrench. Suppose it
should die! O God! O God! What would become of me?
I rose from my chair to go and look at him, and with a candle in my
hand I leaned over him. Seeing him breathing quietly I felt
reassured, when he coughed a third time. It gave me such a shock
tat I started backward, just as one does at sight of something
horrible, and let my candle fall.
As I stood erect after picking it up, I noticed that my temples were
bathed in perspiration, that cold sweat which is the result of
anguish of soul. And I remained until daylight bending over my son,
becoming calm when he remained quiet for some time, and filled with
atrocious pain when a weak cough came from his mouth.
He awoke with his eyes red, his throat choked, and with an air of
When the woman came in to arrange my room I sent her at once for a
doctor. He came at the end of an hour, and said, after examining
"Did he not catch cold?"
I began to tremble like a person with palsy, and I faltered:
"No, I do not think so."
And then I said:
"What is the matter? Is it serious?"
"I do not know yet," he replied. "I will come again this evening."
He came that evening. My son had remained almost all day in a
condition of drowsiness, coughing from time to time. During the
night inflammation of the lungs set in.
That lasted ten days. I cannot express what I suffered in those
interminable hours that divide morning from night, right from
And since—since that moment, I have not passed one hour, not a
single hour, without the frightful burning recollection, a gnawing
recollection, a memory that seems to wring my heart, awaking in me
like a savage beast imprisoned in the depth of my soul.
Oh! if I could have gone mad!
M. Poirel de la Voulte raised his spectacles with a motion that was
peculiar to him whenever he finished reading a contract; and the three
heirs of the defunct looked at one another without speaking, pale and
At the end of a minute the lawyer resumed:
"That must be destroyed."
The other two bent their heads in sign of assent. He lighted a candle,
carefully separated the pages containing the damaging confession from
those relating to the disposition of money, then he held them over the
candle and threw them into the fireplace.
And they watched the white sheets as they burned, till they were
presently reduced to little crumbling black heaps. And as some words were
still visible in white tracing, the daughter, with little strokes of the
toe of her shoe, crushed the burning paper, mixing it with the old ashes
in the fireplace.
Then all three stood there watching it for some time, as if they feared
that the destroyed secret might escape from the fireplace.
A MOTHER OF MONSTERS
I recalled this horrible story, the events of which occurred long ago,
and this horrible woman, the other day at a fashionable seaside resort,
where I saw on the beach a well-known young, elegant and charming
Parisienne, adored and respected by everyone.
I had been invited by a friend to pay him a visit in a little provincial
town. He took me about in all directions to do the honors of the place,
showed me noted scenes, chateaux, industries, ruins. He pointed out
monuments, churches, old carved doorways, enormous or distorted trees,
the oak of St. Andrew, and the yew tree of Roqueboise.
When I had exhausted my admiration and enthusiasm over all the sights, my
friend said with a distressed expression on his face, that there was
nothing left to look at. I breathed freely. I would now be able to rest
under the shade of the trees. But, all at once, he uttered an
"Oh, yes! We have the 'Mother of Monsters'; I must take you to see her."
"Who is that, the 'Mother of Monsters'?" I asked.
"She is an abominable woman," he replied, "a regular demon, a being who
voluntarily brings into the world deformed, hideous, frightful children,
monstrosities, in fact, and then sells them to showmen who exhibit such
"These exploiters of freaks come from time to time to find out if she has
any fresh monstrosity, and if it meets with their approval they carry it
away with them, paying the mother a compensation.
"She has eleven of this description. She is rich.
"You think I am joking, romancing, exaggerating. No, my friend; I am
telling you the truth, the exact truth.
"Let us go and see this woman. Then I will tell you her history."
He took me into one of the suburbs. The woman lived in a pretty little
house by the side of the road. It was attractive and well kept. The
garden was filled with fragrant flowers. One might have supposed it to be
the residence of a retired lawyer.
A maid ushered us into a sort of little country parlor, and the wretch
appeared. She was about forty. She was a tall, big woman with hard
features, but well formed, vigorous and healthy, the true type of a
robust peasant woman, half animal, and half woman.
She was aware of her reputation and received everyone with a humility
that smacked of hatred.
"What do the gentlemen wish?" she asked.
"They tell me that your last child is just like an ordinary child, that
he does not resemble his brothers at all," replied my friend. "I wanted
to be sure of that. Is it true?"
She cast on us a malicious and furious look as she said:
"Oh, no, oh, no, my poor sir! He is perhaps even uglier than the rest. I
have no luck, no luck!
"They are all like that, it is heartbreaking! How can the good God be so
hard on a poor woman who is all alone in the world, how can He?" She
spoke hurriedly, her eyes cast down, with a deprecating air as of a wild
beast who is afraid. Her harsh voice became soft, and it seemed strange
to hear those tearful falsetto tones issuing from that big, bony frame,
of unusual strength and with coarse outlines, which seemed fitted for
violent action, and made to utter howls like a wolf.
"We should like to see your little one," said my friend.
I fancied she colored up. I may have been deceived. After a few moments
of silence, she said in a louder tone:
"What good will that do you?"
"Why do you not wish to show it to us?" replied my friend. "There are
many people to whom you will show it; you know whom I mean."
She gave a start, and resuming her natural voice, and giving free play to
her anger, she screamed:
"Was that why you came here? To insult me? Because my children are like
animals, tell me? You shall not see him, no, no, you shall not see him!
Go away, go away! I do not know why you all try to torment me like that."
She walked over toward us, her hands on her hips. At the brutal tone of
her voice, a sort of moaning, or rather a mewing, the lamentable cry of
an idiot, came from the adjoining room. I shivered to the marrow of my
bones. We retreated before her.
"Take care, Devil" (they called her the Devil); said my friend, "take
care; some day you will get yourself into trouble through this."
She began to tremble, beside herself with fury, shaking her fist and
"Be off with you! What will get me into trouble? Be off with you,
She was about to attack us, but we fled, saddened at what we had seen.
When we got outside, my friend said:
"Well, you have seen her, what do you think of her?"
"Tell me the story of this brute," I replied.
And this is what he told me as we walked along the white high road, with
ripe crops on either side of it which rippled like the sea in the light
breeze that passed over them.
"This woman was one a servant on a farm. She was an honest girl, steady
and economical. She was never known to have an admirer, and never
suspected of any frailty. But she went astray, as so many do.
"She soon found herself in trouble, and was tortured with fear and shame.
Wishing to conceal her misfortune, she bound her body tightly with a
corset of her own invention, made of boards and cord. The more she
developed, the more she bound herself with this instrument of torture,
suffering martyrdom, but brave in her sorrow, not allowing anyone to see,
or suspect, anything. She maimed the little unborn being, cramping it
with that frightful corset, and made a monster of it. Its head was
squeezed and elongated to a point, and its large eyes seemed popping out
of its head. Its limbs, exaggeratedly long, and twisted like the stalk of
a vine, terminated in fingers like the claws of a spider. Its trunk was
tiny, and round as a nut.
"The child was born in an open field, and when the weeders saw it, they
fled away, screaming, and the report spread that she had given birth to a
demon. From that time on, she was called 'the Devil.'
"She was driven from the farm, and lived on charity, under a cloud. She
brought up the monster, whom she hated with a savage hatred, and would
have strangled, perhaps, if the priest had not threatened her with
"One day some travelling showmen heard about the frightful creature, and
asked to see it, so that if it pleased them they might take it away. They
were pleased, and counted out five hundred francs to the mother. At
first, she had refused to let them see the little animal, as she was
ashamed; but when she discovered it had a money value, and that these
people were anxious to get it, she began to haggle with them, raising her
price with all a peasant's persistence.
"She made them draw up a paper, in which they promised to pay her four
hundred francs a year besides, as though they had taken this deformity
into their employ.
"Incited by the greed of gain, she continued to produce these phenomena,
so as to have an assured income like a bourgeoise.
"Some of them were long, some short, some like crabs-all bodies-others
like lizards. Several died, and she was heartbroken.
"The law tried to interfere, but as they had no proof they let her
continue to produce her freaks.
"She has at this moment eleven alive, and they bring in, on an average,
counting good and bad years, from five to six thousand francs a year.
One, alone, is not placed, the one she was unwilling to show us. But she
will not keep it long, for she is known to all the showmen in the world,
who come from time to time to see if she has anything new.
"She even gets bids from them when the monster is valuable."
My friend was silent. A profound disgust stirred my heart, and a feeling
of rage, of regret, to think that I had not strangled this brute when I
had the opportunity.
I had forgotten this story, when I saw on the beach of a fashionable
resort the other day, an elegant, charming, dainty woman, surrounded by
men who paid her respect as well as admiration.
I was walking along the beach, arm in arm with a friend, the resident
physician. Ten minutes later, I saw a nursemaid with three children, who
were rolling in the sand. A pair of little crutches lay on the ground,
and touched my sympathy. I then noticed that these three children were
all deformed, humpbacked, or crooked; and hideous.
"Those are the offspring of that charming woman you saw just now," said
I was filled with pity for her, as well as for them, and exclaimed: "Oh,
the poor mother! How can she ever laugh!"
"Do not pity her, my friend. Pity the poor children," replied the doctor.
"This is the consequence of preserving a slender figure up to the last.
These little deformities were made by the corset. She knows very well
that she is risking her life at this game. But what does she care, as
long as he can be beautiful and have admirers!"
And then I recalled that other woman, the peasant, the "Devil," who sold
her children, her monsters.
AN UNCOMFORTABLE BED
One autumn I went to spend the hunting season with some friends in a
chateau in Picardy.
My friends were fond of practical jokes. I do not care to know people who
When I arrived, they gave me a princely reception, which at once awakened
suspicion in my mind. They fired off rifles, embraced me, made much of
me, as if they expected to have great fun at my expense.
I said to myself:
"Look out, old ferret! They have something in store for you."
During the dinner the mirth was excessive, exaggerated, in fact. I
thought: "Here are people who have more than their share of amusement,
and apparently without reason. They must have planned some good joke.
Assuredly I am to be the victim of the joke. Attention!"
During the entire evening every one laughed in an exaggerated fashion. I
scented a practical joke in the air, as a dog scents game. But what was
it? I was watchful, restless. I did not let a word, or a meaning, or a
gesture escape me. Every one seemed to me an object of suspicion, and I
even looked distrustfully at the faces of the servants.
The hour struck for retiring; and the whole household came to escort me
to my room. Why?
They called to me: "Good-night." I entered the apartment, shut the door,
and remained standing, without moving a single step, holding the wax
candle in my hand.
I heard laughter and whispering in the corridor. Without doubt they were
spying on me. I cast a glance round the walls, the furniture, the
ceiling, the hangings, the floor. I saw nothing to justify suspicion. I
heard persons moving about outside my door. I had no doubt they were
looking through the keyhole.
An idea came into my head: "My candle may suddenly go out and leave me in
Then I went across to the mantelpiece and lighted all the wax candles
that were on it. After that I cast another glance around me without
discovering anything. I advanced with short steps, carefully examining
the apartment. Nothing. I inspected every article, one after the other.
Still nothing. I went over to the window. The shutters, large wooden
shutters, were open. I shut them with great care, and then drew the
curtains, enormous velvet curtains, and placed a chair in front of them,
so as to have nothing to fear from outside.
Then I cautiously sat down. The armchair was solid. I did not venture to
get into the bed. However, the night was advancing; and I ended by coming
to the conclusion that I was foolish. If they were spying on me, as I
supposed, they must, while waiting for the success of the joke they had
been preparing for me, have been laughing immoderately at my terror. So I
made up my mind to go to bed. But the bed was particularly
suspicious-looking. I pulled at the curtains. They seemed to be secure.
All the same, there was danger. I was going perhaps to receive a cold
shower both from overhead, or perhaps, the moment I stretched myself out,
to find myself sinking to the floor with my mattress. I searched in my
memory for all the practical jokes of which I ever had experience. And I
did not want to be caught. Ah! certainly not! certainly not! Then I
suddenly bethought myself of a precaution which I considered insured
safety. I caught hold of the side of the mattress gingerly, and very
slowly drew it toward me. It came away, followed by the sheet and the
rest of the bedclothes. I dragged all these objects into the very middle
of the room, facing the entrance door. I made my bed over again as best I
could at some distance from the suspected bedstead and the corner which
had filled me with such anxiety. Then I extinguished all the candles,
and, groping my way, I slipped under the bed clothes.
For at least another hour I remained awake, starting at the slightest
sound. Everything seemed quiet in the chateau. I fell asleep.
I must have been in a deep sleep for a long time, but all of a sudden I
was awakened with a start by the fall of a heavy body tumbling right on
top of my own, and, at the same time, I received on my face, on my neck,
and on my chest a burning liquid which made me utter a howl of pain. And
a dreadful noise, as if a sideboard laden with plates and dishes had
fallen down, almost deafened me.
I was smothering beneath the weight that was crushing me and preventing
me from moving. I stretched out my hand to find out what was the nature
of this object. I felt a face, a nose, and whiskers. Then, with all my
strength, I launched out a blow at this face. But I immediately received
a hail of cuffings which made me jump straight out of the soaked sheets,
and rush in my nightshirt into the corridor, the door of which I found
Oh, heavens! it was broad daylight. The noise brought my friends hurrying
into my apartment, and we found, sprawling over my improvised bed, the
dismayed valet, who, while bringing me my morning cup of tea, had tripped
over this obstacle in the middle of the floor and fallen on his stomach,
spilling my breakfast over my face in spite of himself.
The precautions I had taken in closing the shutters and going to sleep in
the middle of the room had only brought about the practical joke I had
been trying to avoid.
Oh, how they all laughed that day!
"Hello! there's Milial!" said somebody near me. I looked at the man who
had been pointed out as I had been wishing for a long time to meet this
He was no longer young. His gray hair looked a little like those fur
bonnets worn by certain Northern peoples, and his long beard, which fell
down over his chest, had also somewhat the appearance of fur. He was
talking to a lady, leaning toward her, speaking in a low voice and
looking at her with an expression full of respect and tenderness.
I knew his life, or at least as much as was known of it. He had loved
madly several times, and there had been certain tragedies with which his
name had been connected. When I spoke to women who were the loudest in
his praise, and asked them whence came this power, they always answered,
after thinking for a while: "I don't know—he has a certain charm
He was certainly not handsome. He had none of the elegance that we
ascribe to conquerors of feminine hearts. I wondered what might be his
hid den charm. Was it mental? I never had heard of a clever saying of
his. In his glance? Perhaps. Or in his voice? The voices of some beings
have a certain irresistible attraction, almost suggesting the flavor of
things good to eat. One is hungry for them, and the sound of their words
penetrates us like a dainty morsel. A friend was passing. I asked him:
"Do you know Monsieur Milial?"
A minute later we were shaking hands and talking in the doorway. What he
said was correct, agreeable to hear; it contained no irritable thought.
The voice was sweet, soft, caressing, musical; but I had heard others
much more attractive, much more moving. One listened to him with
pleasure, just as one would look at a pretty little brook. No tension of
the mind was necessary in order to follow him, no hidden meaning aroused
curiosity, no expectation awoke interest. His conversation was rather
restful, but it did not awaken in one either a desire to answer, to
contradict or to approve, and it was as easy to answer him as it was to
listen to him. The response came to the lips of its own accord, as soon
as he had finished talking, and phrases turned toward him as if he had
naturally aroused them.
One thought soon struck me. I had known him for a quarter of an hour, and
it seemed as if he were already one of my old friends, that I had known
all about him for a long time; his face, his gestures, his voice, his
ideas. Suddenly, after a few minutes of conversation, he seemed already
to be installed in my intimacy. All constraint disappeared between us,
and, had he so desired, I might have confided in him as one confides only
in old friends.
Certainly there was some mystery about him. Those barriers that are
closed between most people and that are lowered with time when sympathy,
similar tastes, equal intellectual culture and constant intercourse
remove constraint—those barriers seemed not to exist between him
and me, and no doubt this was the case between him and all people, both
men and women, whom fate threw in his path.
After half an hour we parted, promising to see each other often, and he
gave me his address after inviting me to take luncheon with him in two
I forgot what hour he had stated, and I arrived too soon; he was not yet
home. A correct and silent domestic showed me into a beautiful, quiet,
softly lighted parlor. I felt comfortable there, at home. How often I
have noticed the influence of apartments on the character and on the
mind! There are some which make one feel foolish; in others, on the
contrary, one always feels lively. Some make us sad, although well
lighted and decorated in light-colored furniture; others cheer us up,
although hung with sombre material. Our eye, like our heart, has its
likes and dislikes, of which it does not inform us, and which it secretly
imposes on our temperament. The harmony of furniture, walls, the style of
an ensemble, act immediately on our mental state, just as the air from
the woods, the sea or the mountains modifies our physical natures.
I sat down on a cushion-covered divan and felt myself suddenly carried
and supported by these little silk bags of feathers, as if the outline of
my body had been marked out beforehand on this couch.
Then I looked about. There was nothing striking about the room;
every-where were beautiful and modest things, simple and rare furniture,
Oriental curtains which did not seem to come from a department store but
from the interior of a harem; and exactly opposite me hung the portrait
of a woman. It was a portrait of medium size, showing the head and the
upper part of the body, and the hands, which were holding a book. She was
young, bareheaded; ribbons were woven in her hair; she was smiling sadly.
Was it because she was bareheaded, was it merely her natural expression?
I never have seen a portrait of a lady which seemed so much in its place
as that one in that dwelling. Of all those I knew I have seen nothing
like that one. All those that I know are on exhibition, whether the lady
be dressed in her gaudiest gown, with an attractive headdress and a look
which shows that she is posing first of all before the artist and then
before those who will look at her or whether they have taken a
comfortable attitude in an ordinary gown. Some are standing majestically
in all their beauty, which is not at all natural to them in life. All of
them have something, a flower or, a jewel, a crease in the dress or a
curve of the lip, which one feels to have been placed there for effect by
the artist. Whether they wear a hat or merely their hair one can
immediately notice that they are not entirely natural. Why? One cannot
say without knowing them, but the effect is there. They seem to be
calling somewhere, on people whom they wish to please and to whom they
wish to appear at their best advantage; and they have studied their
attitudes, sometimes modest, Sometimes haughty.
What could one say about this one? She was at home and alone. Yes, she
was alone, for she was smiling as one smiles when thinking in solitude of
something sad or sweet, and not as one smiles when one is being watched.
She seemed so much alone and so much at home that she made the whole
large apartment seem absolutely empty. She alone lived in it, filled it,
gave it life. Many people might come in and converse, laugh, even sing;
she would still be alone with a solitary smile, and she alone would give
it life with her pictured gaze.
That look also was unique. It fell directly on me, fixed and caressing,
without seeing me. All portraits know that they are being watched, and
they answer with their eyes, which see, think, follow us without leaving
us, from the very moment we enter the apartment they inhabit. This one
did not see me; it saw nothing, although its look was fixed directly on
me. I remembered the surprising verse of Baudelaire:
And your eyes, attractive as those of a portrait.
They did indeed attract me in an irresistible manner; those painted eyes
which had lived, or which were perhaps still living, threw over me a
strange, powerful spell. Oh, what an infinite and tender charm, like a
passing breeze, like a dying sunset of lilac rose and blue, a little sad
like the approaching night, which comes behind the sombre frame and out
of those impenetrable eyes! Those eyes, created by a few strokes from a
brush, hide behind them the mystery of that which seems to be and which
does not exist, which can appear in the eyes of a woman, which can make
love blossom within us.
The door opened and M. Milial entered. He excused himself for being late.
I excused myself for being ahead of time. Then I said: "Might I ask you
who is this lady?"
He answered: "That is my mother. She died very young."
Then I understood whence came the inexplicable attraction of this man.
The north wind was blowing a hurricane, driving through the sky big,
black, heavy clouds from which the rain poured down on the earth with
A high sea was raging and dashing its huge, slow, foamy waves along the
coast with the rumbling sound of thunder. The waves followed each other
close, rolling in as high as mountains, scattering the foam as they
The storm engulfed itself in the little valley of Yport, whistling and
moaning, tearing the shingles from the roofs, smashing the shutters,
knocking down the chimneys, rushing through the narrow streets in such
gusts that one could walk only by holding on to the walls, and children
would have been lifted up like leaves and carried over the houses into
The fishing smacks had been hauled high up on land, because at high tide
the sea would sweep the beach. Several sailors, sheltered behind the
curved bottoms of their boats, were watching this battle of the sky and
Then, one by one, they went away, for night was falling on the storm,
wrapping in shadows the raging ocean and all the battling elements.
Just two men remained, their hands plunged deep into their pockets,
bending their backs beneath the squall, their woolen caps pulled down
over their ears; two big Normandy fishermen, bearded, their skin tanned
through exposure, with the piercing black eyes of the sailor who looks
over the horizon like a bird of prey.
One of them was saying:
"Come on, Jeremie, let's go play dominoes. It's my treat."
The other hesitated a while, tempted on one hand by the game and the
thought of brandy, knowing well that, if he went to Paumelle's, he would
return home drunk; held back, on the other hand, by the idea of his wife
remaining alone in the house.
"Any one might think that you had made a bet to get me drunk every night.
Say, what good is it doing you, since it's always you that's treating?"
Nevertheless he was smiling at the idea of all this brandy drunk at the
expense of another. He was smiling the contented smirk of an avaricious
Mathurin, his friend, kept pulling him by the sleeve.
"Come on, Jeremie. This isn't the kind of a night to go home without
anything to warm you up. What are you afraid of? Isn't your wife going to
warm your bed for you?"
"The other night I couldn't find the door—I had to be fished out of
the ditch in front of the house!"
He was still laughing at this drunkard's recollection, and he was
unconsciously going toward Paumelle's Cafe, where a light was shining in
the window; he was going, pulled by Mathurin and pushed by the wind,
unable to resist these combined forces.
The low room was full of sailors, smoke and noise. All these men, clad in
woolens, their elbows on the tables, were shouting to make themselves
heard. The more people came in, the more one had to shout in order to
overcome the noise of voices and the rattling of dominoes on the marble
Jeremie and Mathurin sat down in a corner and began a game, and the
glasses were emptied in rapid succession into their thirsty throats.
Then they played more games and drank more glasses. Mathurin kept pouring
and winking to the saloon keeper, a big, red-faced man, who chuckled as
though at the thought of some fine joke; and Jeremie kept absorbing
alcohol and wagging his head, giving vent to a roar of laughter and
looking at his comrade with a stupid and contented expression.
All the customers were going away. Every time that one of them would open
the door to leave a gust of wind would blow into the cafe, making the
tobacco smoke swirl around, swinging the lamps at the end of their chains
and making their flames flicker, and suddenly one could hear the deep
booming of a breaking wave and the moaning of the wind.
Jeremie, his collar unbuttoned, was taking drunkard's poses, one leg
outstretched, one arm hanging down and in the other hand holding a
They were alone now with the owner, who had come up to them, interested.
"Well, Jeremie, how goes it inside? Feel less thirsty after wetting your
"The more I wet it, the drier it gets inside."
The innkeeper cast a sly glance at Mathurin. He said:
"And your brother, Mathurin, where's he now?"
The sailor laughed silently:
"Don't worry; he's warm, all right."
And both of them looked toward Jeremie, who was triumphantly putting down
the double six and announcing:
Then the owner declared:
"Well, boys, I'm goin' to bed. I will leave you the lamp and the bottle;
there's twenty cents' worth in it. Lock the door when you go, Mathurin,
and slip the key under the mat the way you did the other night."
"Don't worry; it'll be all right."
Paumelle shook hands with his two customers and slowly went up the wooden
stairs. For several minutes his heavy step echoed through the little
house. Then a loud creaking announced that he had got into bed.
The two men continued to play. From time to time a more violent gust of
wind would shake the whole house, and the two drinkers would look up, as
though some one were about to enter. Then Mathurin would take the bottle
and fill Jeremie's glass. But suddenly the clock over the bar struck
twelve. Its hoarse clang sounded like the rattling of saucepans. Then
Mathurin got up like a sailor whose watch is over.
"Come on, Jeremie, we've got to get out."
The other man rose to his feet with difficulty, got his balance by
leaning on the table, reached the door and opened it while his companion
was putting out the light.
As soon as they were in the street Mathurin locked the door and then
"Well, so long. See you to-morrow night!"
And he disappeared in the darkness.
Jeremie took a few steps, staggered, stretched out his hands, met a wall
which supported him and began to stumble along. From time to time a gust
of wind would sweep through the street, pushing him forward, making him
run for a few steps; then, when the wind would die down, he would stop
short, having lost his impetus, and once more he would begin to stagger
on his unsteady drunkard's legs.
He went instinctively toward his home, just as birds go to their nests.
Finally he recognized his door, and began to feel about for the keyhole
and tried to put the key in it. Not finding the hole, he began to swear.
Then he began to beat on the door with his fists, calling for his wife to
come and help him:
"Melina! Oh, Melina!"
As he leaned against the door for support, it gave way and opened, and
Jeremie, losing his prop, fell inside, rolling on his face into the
middle of his room, and he felt something heavy pass over him and escape
in the night.
He was no longer moving, dazed by fright, bewildered, fearing the devil,
ghosts, all the mysterious beings of darkness, and he waited a long time
without daring to move. But when he found out that nothing else was
moving, a little reason returned to him, the reason of a drunkard.
Gently he sat up. Again he waited a long time, and at last, growing
bolder, he called:
His wife did not answer.
Then, suddenly, a suspicion crossed his darkened mind, an indistinct,
vague suspicion. He was not moving; he was sitting there in the dark,
trying to gather together his scattered wits, his mind stumbling over
incomplete ideas, just as his feet stumbled along.
Once more he asked:
"Who was it, Melina? Tell me who it was. I won't hurt you!"
He waited, no voice was raised in the darkness. He was now reasoning with
himself out loud.
"I'm drunk, all right! I'm drunk! And he filled me up, the dog; he did
it, to stop my goin' home. I'm drunk!"
And he would continue:
"Tell me who it was, Melina, or somethin'll happen to you."
After having waited again, he went on with the slow and obstinate logic
of a drunkard:
"He's been keeping me at that loafer Paumelle's place every night, so as
to stop my going home. It's some trick. Oh, you damned carrion!"
Slowly he got on his knees. A blind fury was gaining possession of him,
mingling with the fumes of alcohol.
"Tell me who it was, Melina, or you'll get a licking—I warn you!"
He was now standing, trembling with a wild fury, as though the alcohol
had set his blood on fire. He took a step, knocked against a chair,
seized it, went on, reached the bed, ran his hands over it and felt the
warm body of his wife.
Then, maddened, he roared:
"So! You were there, you piece of dirt, and you wouldn't answer!"
And, lifting the chair, which he was holding in his strong sailor's grip,
he swung it down before him with an exasperated fury. A cry burst from
the bed, an agonizing, piercing cry. Then he began to thrash around like
a thresher in a barn. And soon nothing more moved. The chair was broken
to pieces, but he still held one leg and beat away with it, panting.
At last he stopped to ask:
"Well, are you ready to tell me who it was?"
Melina did not answer.
Then tired out, stupefied from his exertion, he stretched himself out on
the ground and slept.
When day came a neighbor, seeing the door open, entered. He saw Jeremie
snoring on the floor, amid the broken pieces of a chair, and on the bed a
pulp of flesh and blood.
As we sat chatting after dinner, a party of men, the conversation turned
on women, for lack of something else.
One of us said:
"Here's a funny thing that happened to me on, that very subject." And he
told us the following story:
One evening last winter I suddenly felt overcome by that overpowering
sense of misery and languor that takes possession of one from time to
time. I was in my own apartment, all alone, and I was convinced that if I
gave in to my feelings I should have a terrible attack of melancholia,
one of those attacks that lead to suicide when they recur too often.
I put on my overcoat and went out without the slightest idea of what I
was going to do. Having gone as far as the boulevards, I began to wander
along by the almost empty cafes. It was raining, a fine rain that affects
your mind as it does your clothing, not one of those good downpours which
come down in torrents, driving breathless passers-by into doorways, but a
rain without drops that deposits on your clothing an imperceptible spray
and soon covers you with a sort of iced foam that chills you through.
What should I do? I walked in one direction and then came back, looking
for some place where I could spend two hours, and discovering for the
first time that there is no place of amusement in Paris in the evening.
At last I decided to go to the Folies-Bergere, that entertaining resort
for gay women.
There were very few people in the main hall. In the long horseshoe curve
there were only a few ordinary looking people, whose plebeian origin was
apparent in their manners, their clothes, the cut of their hair and
beard, their hats, their complexion. It was rarely that one saw from time
to time a man whom you suspected of having washed himself thoroughly, and
his whole make-up seemed to match. As for the women, they were always the
same, those frightful women you all know, ugly, tired looking, drooping,
and walking along in their lackadaisical manner, with that air of foolish
superciliousness which they assume, I do not know why.
I thought to myself that, in truth, not one of those languid creatures,
greasy rather than fat, puffed out here and thin there, with the contour
of a monk and the lower extremities of a bow-legged snipe, was worth the
louis that they would get with great difficulty after asking five.
But all at once I saw a little creature whom I thought attractive, not in
her first youth, but fresh, comical and tantalizing. I stopped her, and
stupidly, without thinking, I made an appointment with her for that
night. I did not want to go back to my own home alone, all alone; I
preferred the company and the caresses of this hussy.
And I followed her. She lived in a great big house in the Rue des
Martyrs. The gas was already extinguished on the stairway. I ascended the
steps slowly, lighting a candle match every few seconds, stubbing my foot
against the steps, stumbling and angry as I followed the rustle of the
skirt ahead of me.
She stopped on the fourth floor, and having closed the outer door she
"Then you will stay till to-morrow?"
"Why, yes. You know that that was the agreement."
"All right, my dear, I just wanted to know. Wait for me here a minute, I
will be right back."
And she left me in the darkness. I heard her shutting two doors and then
I thought I heard her talking. I was surprised and uneasy. The thought
that she had a protector staggered me. But I have good fists and a solid
back. "We shall see," I said to myself.
I listened attentively with ear and mind. Some one was stirring about,
walking quietly and very carefully. Then another door was opened and I
thought I again heard some one talking, but in a very low tone.
She came back carrying a lighted candle.
"You may come in," she said.
She said "thou" in speaking to me, which was an indication of possession.
I went in and after passing through a dining room in which it was very
evident that no one ever ate, I entered a typical room of all these
women, a furnished room with red curtains and a soiled eiderdown bed
"Make yourself at home, 'mon chat'," she said.
I gave a suspicious glance at the room, but there seemed no reason for
As she took off her wraps she began to laugh.
"Well, what ails you? Are you changed into a pillar of salt? Come, hurry
I did as she suggested.
Five minutes later I longed to put on my things and get away. But this
terrible languor that had overcome me at home took possession of me
again, and deprived me of energy enough to move and I stayed in spite of
the disgust that I felt for this association. The unusual attractiveness
that I supposed I had discovered in this creature over there under the
chandeliers of the theater had altogether vanished on closer
acquaintance, and she was nothing more to me now than a common woman,
like all the others, whose indifferent and complaisant kiss smacked of
I thought I would say something.
"Have you lived here long?" I asked.
"Over six months on the fifteenth of January."
"Where were you before that?"
"In the Rue Clauzel. But the janitor made me very uncomfortable and I
And she began to tell me an interminable story of a janitor who had
talked scandal about her.
But, suddenly, I heard something moving quite close to us. First there
was a sigh, then a slight, but distinct, sound as if some one had turned
round on a chair.
I sat up abruptly and asked.
"What was that noise?"
She answered quietly and confidently:
"Do not be uneasy, my dear boy, it is my neighbor. The partition is so
thin that one can hear everything as if it were in the room. These are
wretched rooms, just like pasteboard."
I felt so lazy that I paid no further attention to it. We resumed our
conversation. Driven by the stupid curiosity that prompts all men to
question these creatures about their first experiences, to attempt to
lift the veil of their first folly, as though to find in them a trace of
pristine innocence, to love them, possibly, in a fleeting memory of their
candor and modesty of former days, evoked by a word, I insistently asked
her about her earlier lovers.
I knew she was telling me lies. What did it matter? Among all these lies
I might, perhaps, discover something sincere and pathetic.
"Come," said I, "tell me who he was."
"He was a boating man, my dear."
"Ah! Tell me about it. Where were you?"
"I was at Argenteuil."
"What were you doing?"
"I was waitress in a restaurant."
"'The Freshwater Sailor.' Do you know it?"
"I should say so, kept by Bonanfan."
"Yes, that's it."
"And how did he make love to you, this boating man?"
"While I was doing his room. He took advantage of me."
But I suddenly recalled the theory of a friend of mine, an observant and
philosophical physician whom constant attendance in hospitals has brought
into daily contact with girl-mothers and prostitutes, with all the shame
and all the misery of women, of those poor women who have become the
frightful prey of the wandering male with money in his pocket.
"A woman," he said, "is always debauched by a man of her own class and
position. I have volumes of statistics on that subject. We accuse the
rich of plucking the flower of innocence among the girls of the people.
This is not correct. The rich pay for what they want. They may gather
some, but never for the first time."
Then, turning to my companion, I began to laugh.
"You know that I am aware of your history. The boating man was not the
"Oh, yes, my dear, I swear it:"
"You are lying, my dear."
"Oh, no, I assure you."
"You are lying; come, tell me all."
She seemed to hesitate in astonishment. I continued:
"I am a sorcerer, my dear girl, I am a clairvoyant. If you do not tell me
the truth, I will go into a trance sleep and then I can find out."
She was afraid, being as stupid as all her kind. She faltered:
"How did you guess?"
"Come, go on telling me," I said.
"Oh, the first time didn't amount to anything.
"There was a festival in the country. They had sent for a special chef,
M. Alexandre. As soon as he came he did just as he pleased in the house.
He bossed every one, even the proprietor and his wife, as if he had been
a king. He was a big handsome man, who did not seem fitted to stand
beside a kitchen range. He was always calling out, 'Come, some butter
—some eggs—some Madeira!' And it had to be brought to him at
once in a hurry, or he would get cross and say things that would make us
blush all over.
"When the day was over he would smoke a pipe outside the door. And as I
was passing by him with a pile of plates he said to me, like that: 'Come,
girlie, come down to the water with me and show me the country.' I went
with him like a fool, and we had hardly got down to the bank of the river
when he took advantage of me so suddenly that I did not even know what he
was doing. And then he went away on the nine o'clock train. I never saw
"Is that all?" I asked.
"Oh, I think Florentin belongs to him."
"Who is Florentin?"
"My little boy."
"Oh! Well, then, you made the boating man believe that he was the father,
did you not?"
"Did he have any money, this boating man?"
"Yes, he left me an income of three hundred francs, settled on
I was beginning to be amused and resumed:
"All right, my girl, all right. You are all of you less stupid than one
would imagine, all the same. And how old is he now, Florentin?"
"He is now twelve. He will make his first communion in the spring."
"That is splendid. And since then you have carried on your business
She sighed in a resigned manner.
"I must do what I can."
But a loud noise just then coming from the room itself made me start up
with a bound. It sounded like some one falling and picking themselves up
again by feeling along the wall with their hands.
I had seized the candle and was looking about me, terrified and furious.
She had risen also and was trying to hold me back to stop me, murmuring:
"That's nothing, my dear, I assure you it's nothing."
But I had discovered what direction the strange noise came from. I walked
straight towards a door hidden at the head of the bed and I opened it
abruptly and saw before me, trembling, his bright, terrified eyes opened
wide at sight of me, a little pale, thin boy seated beside a large wicker
chair off which he had fallen.
As soon as he saw me he began to cry. Stretching out his arms to his
mother, he cried:
"It was not my fault, mamma, it was not my fault. I was asleep, and I
fell off. Do not scold me, it was not my fault."
I turned to the woman and said:
"What does this mean?"
She seemed confused and worried, and said in a broken voice:
"What do you want me to do? I do not earn enough to put him to school! I
have to keep him with me, and I cannot afford to pay for another room, by
heavens! He sleeps with me when I am alone. If any one comes for one hour
or two he can stay in the wardrobe; he keeps quiet, he understands it.
But when people stay all night, as you have done, it tires the poor child
to sleep on a chair.
"It is not his fault. I should like to see you sleep all night on a
chair—you would have something to say."
She was getting angry and excited and was talking loud.
The child was still crying. A poor delicate timid little fellow, a
veritable child of the wardrobe, of the cold, dark closet, a child who
from time to time was allowed to get a little warmth in the bed if it
chanced to be unoccupied.
I also felt inclined to cry.
And I went home to my own bed.
THE MOUNTAIN POOL
Saint Agnes, May 6.
MY DEAR FRIEND:
You asked me to write to you often and to tell you in particular about
the things I might see. You also begged me to rummage among my
recollections of travels for some of those little anecdotes gathered from
a chance peasant, from an innkeeper, from some strange traveling
acquaintance, which remain as landmarks in the memory. With a landscape
depicted in a few lines, and a little story told in a few sentences you
think one can give the true characteristics of a country, make it living,
visible, dramatic. I will try to do as you wish. I will, therefore,
send you from time to time letters in which I will mention neither you
nor myself, but only the landscape and the people who move about in it.
And now I will begin.
Spring is a season in which one ought, it seems to me, to drink and eat
the landscape. It is the season of chills, just as autumn is the season
of reflection. In spring the country rouses the physical senses, in
autumn it enters into the soul.
I desired this year to breathe the odor of orange blossoms and I set out
for the South of France just at the time that every one else was
returning home. I visited Monaco, the shrine of pilgrims, rival of Mecca
and Jerusalem, without leaving any gold in any one else's pockets, and I
climbed the high mountain beneath a covering of lemon, orange and olive
Have you ever slept, my friend, in a grove of orange trees in flower? The
air that one inhales with delight is a quintessence of perfumes. The
strong yet sweet odor, delicious as some dainty, seems to blend with our
being, to saturate us, to intoxicate us, to enervate us, to plunge us
into a sleepy, dreamy torpor. As though it were an opium prepared by the
hands of fairies and not by those of druggists.
This is a country of ravines. The surface of the mountains is cleft,
hollowed out in all directions, and in these sinuous crevices grow
veritable forests of lemon trees. Here and there where the steep gorge is
interrupted by a sort of step, a kind of reservoir has been built which
holds the water of the rain storms.
They are large holes with slippery walls with nothing for any one to
grasp hold of should they fall in.
I was walking slowly in one of these ascending valleys or gorges,
glancing through the foliage at the vivid-hued fruit that remained on the
branches. The narrow gorge made the heavy odor of the flowers still more
penetrating; the air seemed to be dense with it. A feeling of lassitude
came over me and I looked for a place to sit down. A few drops of water
glistened in the grass. I thought that there was a spring near by and I
climbed a little further to look for it. But I only reached the edge of
one of these large, deep reservoirs.
I sat down tailor fashion, with my legs crossed under me, and remained
there in a reverie before this hole, which looked as if it were filled
with ink, so black and stagnant was the liquid it contained. Down yonder,
through the branches, I saw, like patches, bits of the Mediterranean
gleaming so that they fairly dazzled my eyes. But my glance always
returned to the immense somber well that appeared to be inhabited by no
aquatic animals, so motionless was its surface. Suddenly a voice made me
tremble. An old gentleman who was picking flowers—this country is
the richest in Europe for herbalists—asked me:
"Are you a relation of those poor children, monsieur?"
I looked at him in astonishment.
"What children, monsieur?"
He seemed embarrassed and answered with a bow:
"I beg your pardon. On seeing you sitting thus absorbed in front of this
reservoir I thought you were recalling the frightful tragedy that
Now I wanted to know about it, and I begged him to tell me the story.
It is very dismal and very heart-rending, my dear friend, and very
trivial at the same time. It is a simple news item. I do not know whether
to attribute my emotion to the dramatic manner in which the story was
told to me, to the setting of the mountains, to the contrast between the
joy of the sunlight and the flowers and this black, murderous hole, but
my heart was wrung, all my nerves unstrung by this tale which, perhaps,
may not appear so terribly harrowing to you as you read it in your room
without having the scene of the tragedy before your eyes.
It was one spring in recent years. Two little boys frequently came to
play on the edge of this cistern while their tutor lay under a tree
reading a book. One warm afternoon a piercing cry awoke the tutor who was
dozing and the sound of splashing caused by something falling into the
water made him jump to his feet abruptly. The younger of the children,
eight years of age, was shouting, as he stood beside the reservoir, the
surface of which was stirred and eddying at the spot where the older boy
had fallen in as he ran along the stone coping.
Distracted, without waiting or stopping to think what was best to do, the
tutor jumped into the black water and did not rise again, having struck
his head at the bottom of the cistern.
At the same moment the young boy who had risen to the surface was waving
his stretched-out arms toward his brother. The little fellow on land lay
down full length, while the other tried to swim, to approach the wall,
and presently the four little hands clasped each other, tightened in each
other's grasp, contracted as though they were fastened together. They
both felt the intense joy of an escape from death, a shudder at the
The older boy tried to climb up to the edge, but could not manage it, as
the wall was perpendicular, and his brother, who was too weak, was
sliding slowly towards the hole.
Then they remained motionless, filled anew with terror. And they waited.
The little fellow squeezed his brother's hands with all his might and
wept from nervousness as he repeated: "I cannot drag you out, I cannot
drag you out." And all at once he began to shout, "Help! Help!" But his
light voice scarcely penetrated beyond the dome of foliage above their
They remained thus a long time, hours and hours, facing each other, these
two children, with one thought, one anguish of heart and the horrible
dread that one of them, exhausted, might let go the hands of the other.
And they kept on calling, but all in vain.
At length the older boy, who was shivering with cold, said to the little
one: "I cannot hold out any longer. I am going to fall. Good-by, little
brother." And the other, gasping, replied: "Not yet, not yet, wait."
Evening came on, the still evening with its stars mirrored in the water.
The older lad, his endurance giving out, said: "Let go my hand, I am
going to give you my watch." He had received it as a present a few days
before, and ever since it had been his chief amusement. He was able to
get hold of it, and held it out to the little fellow who was sobbing and
who laid it down on the grass beside him.
It was night now. The two unhappy beings, exhausted, had almost loosened
their grasp. The elder, at last, feeling that he was lost, murmured once
more: "Good-by, little brother, kiss mamma and papa." And his numbed
fingers relaxed their hold. He sank and did not rise again . . . . The
little fellow, left alone, began to shout wildly: "Paul! Paul!" But the
other did not come to the surface.
Then he darted across the mountain, falling among the stones, overcome by
the most frightful anguish that can wring a child's heart, and with a
face like death reached the sitting-room, where his parents were waiting.
He became bewildered again as he led them to the gloomy reservoir. He
could not find his way. At last he reached the spot. "It is there; yes,
it is there!"
But the cistern had to be emptied, and the proprietor would not permit it
as he needed the water for his lemon trees.
The two bodies were found, however, but not until the next day.
You see, my dear friend, that this is a simple news item. But if you had
seen the hole itself your heart would have been wrung, as mine was, at
the thought of the agony of that child hanging to his brother's hands, of
the long suspense of those little chaps who were accustomed only to laugh
and to play, and at the simple incident of the giving of the watch.
I said to myself: "May Fate preserve me from ever receiving a similar
relic!" I know of nothing more terrible than such a recollection
connected with a familiar object that one cannot dispose of. Only think
of it; each time that he handles this sacred watch the survivor will
picture once more the horrible scene; the pool, the wall, the still
water, and the distracted face of his brother-alive, and yet as lost as
though he were already dead. And all through his life, at any moment, the
vision will be there, awakened the instant even the tip of his finger
touches his watch pocket.
And I was sad until evening. I left the spot and kept on climbing,
leaving the region of orange trees for the region of olive trees, and the
region of olive trees for the region of pines; then I came to a valley of
stones, and finally reached the ruins of an ancient castle, built, they
say, in the tenth century by a Saracen chief, a good man, who was
baptized a Christian through love for a young girl. Everywhere around me
were mountains, and before me the sea, the sea with an almost
imperceptible patch on it: Corsica, or, rather, the shadow of Corsica.
But on the mountain summits, blood-red in the glow of the sunset, in the
boundless sky and on the sea, in all this superb landscape that I had
come here to admire I saw only two poor children, one lying prone on the
edge of a hole filled with black water, the other submerged to his neck,
their hands intertwined, weeping opposite each other, in despair. And it
seemed as though I continually heard a weak, exhausted voice saying:
"Good-by, little brother, I am going to give you my watch."
This letter may seem rather melancholy, dear friend. I will try to be
more cheerful some other day.
Last Monday an Indian prince died at Etretat, Bapu Sahib Khanderao
Ghatay, a relation of His Highness, the Maharajah Gaikwar, prince of
Baroda, in the province of Guzerat, Presidency of Bombay.
For about three weeks there had been seen walking in the streets about
ten young East Indians, small, lithe, with dark skins, dressed all in
gray and wearing on their heads caps such as English grooms wear. They
were men of high rank who had come to Europe to study the military
institutions of the principal Western nations. The little band consisted
of three princes, a nobleman, an interpreter and three servants.
The head of the commission had just died, an old man of forty-two and
father-in-law of Sampatro Kashivao Gaikwar, brother of His Highness, the
Gaikwar of Baroda.
The son-in-law accompanied his father-in-law.
The other East Indians were called Ganpatrao Shravanrao Gaikwar, cousin
of His Highness Khasherao Gadhav; Vasudev Madhav Samarth, interpreter and
secretary; the slaves: Ramchandra Bajaji, Ganu bin Pukiram Kokate,
Rhambhaji bin Fabji.
On leaving his native land the one who died recently was overcome with
terrible grief, and feeling convinced that he would never return he
wished to give up the journey, but he had to obey the wishes of his noble
relative, the Prince of Baroda, and he set out.
They came to spend the latter part of the summer at Etretat, and people
would go out of curiosity every morning to see them taking their bath at
the Etablissment des Roches-Blanches.
Five or six days ago Bapu Sahib Khanderao Ghatay was taken with pains in
his gums; then the inflammation spread to the throat and became
ulceration. Gangrene set in and, on Monday, the doctors told his young
friends that their relative was dying. The final struggle was already
beginning, and the breath had almost left the unfortunate man's body when
his friends seized him, snatched him from his bed and laid him on the
stone floor of the room, so that, stretched out on the earth, our mother,
he should yield up his soul, according to the command of Brahma.
They then sent to ask the mayor, M. Boissaye, for a permit to burn the
body that very day so as to fulfill the prescribed ceremonial of the
Hindoo religion. The mayor hesitated, telegraphed to the prefecture to
demand instructions, at the same time sending word that a failure to
reply would be considered by him tantamount to a consent. As he had
received no reply at 9 o'clock that evening, he decided, in view of the
infectious character of the disease of which the East Indian had died,
that the cremation of the body should take place that very night, beneath
the cliff, on the beach, at ebb tide.
The mayor is being criticized now for this decision, though he acted as
an intelligent, liberal and determined man, and was upheld and advised by
the three physicians who had watched the case and reported the death.
They were dancing at the Casino that evening. It was an early autumn
evening, rather chilly. A pretty strong wind was blowing from the ocean,
although as yet there was no sea on, and swift, light, ragged clouds were
driving across the sky. They came from the edge of the horizon, looking
dark against the background of the sky, but as they approached the moon
they grew whiter and passed hurriedly across her face, veiling it for a
few seconds without completely hiding it.
The tall straight cliffs that inclose the rounded beach of Etretat and
terminate in two celebrated arches, called "the Gates," lay in shadow,
and made two great black patches in the softly lighted landscape.
It had rained all day.
The Casino orchestra was playing waltzes, polkas and quadrilles. A rumor
was presently circulated among the groups of dancers. It was said that an
East Indian prince had just died at the Hotel des Bains and that the
ministry had been approached for permission to burn the body. No one
believed it, or at least no one supposed that such a thing could occur so
foreign was the custom as yet to our customs, and as the night was far
advanced every one went home.
At midnight, the lamplighter, running from street to street,
extinguished, one after another, the yellow jets of flame that lighted up
the sleeping houses, the mud and the puddles of water. We waited,
watching for the hour when the little town should be quiet and deserted.
Ever since noon a carpenter had been cutting up wood and asking himself
with amazement what was going to be done with all these planks sawn up
into little bits, and why one should destroy so much good merchandise.
This wood was piled up in a cart which went along through side streets as
far as the beach, without arousing the suspicion of belated persons who
might meet it. It went along on the shingle at the foot of the cliff, and
having dumped its contents on the beach the three Indian servants began
to build a funeral pile, a little longer than it was wide. They worked
alone, for no profane hand must aid in this solemn duty.
It was one o'clock in the morning when the relations of the deceased were
informed that they might accomplish their part of the work.
The door of the little house they occupied was open, and we perceived,
lying on a stretcher in the small, dimly lighted vestibule the corpse
covered with white silk. We could see him plainly as he lay stretched out
on his back, his outline clearly defined beneath this white veil.
The East Indians, standing at his feet, remained motionless, while one of
them performed the prescribed rites, murmuring unfamiliar words in a low,
monotonous tone. He walked round and round the corpse; touching it
occasionally, then, taking an urn suspended from three slender chains, he
sprinkled it for some time with the sacred water of the Ganges, that East
Indians must always carry with them wherever they go.
Then the stretcher was lifted by four of them who started off at a slow
march. The moon had gone down, leaving the muddy, deserted streets in
darkness, but the body on the stretcher appeared to be luminous, so
dazzlingly white was the silk, and it was a weird sight to see, passing
along through the night, the semi-luminous form of this corpse, borne by
those men, the dusky skin of whose faces and hands could scarcely be
distinguished from their clothing in the darkness.
Behind the corpse came three Indians, and then, a full head taller than
themselves and wrapped in an ample traveling coat of a soft gray color,
appeared the outline of an Englishman, a kind and superior man, a friend
of theirs, who was their guide and counselor in their European travels.
Beneath the cold, misty sky of this little northern beach I felt as if I
were taking part in a sort of symbolical drama. It seemed to me that they
were carrying there, before me, the conquered genius of India, followed,
as in a funeral procession, by the victorious genius of England robed in
a gray ulster.
On the shingly beach the four bearers halted a few moments to take
breath, and then proceeded on their way. They now walked quickly, bending
beneath the weight of their burden. At length they reached the funeral
pile. It was erected in an indentation, at the very foot of the cliff,
which rose above it perpendicularly a hundred meters high, perfectly
white but looking gray in the night.
The funeral pile was about three and a half feet high. The corpse was
placed on it and then one of the Indians asked to have the pole star
pointed out to him. This was done, and the dead Rajah was laid with his
feet turned towards his native country. Then twelve bottles of kerosene
were poured over him and he was covered completely with thin slabs of
pine wood. For almost another hour the relations and servants kept piling
up the funeral pyre which looked like one of those piles of wood that
carpenters keep in their yards. Then on top of this was poured the
contents of twenty bottles of oil, and on top of all they emptied a bag
of fine shavings. A few steps further on, a flame was glimmering in a
little bronze brazier, which had remained lighted since the arrival of
The moment had arrived. The relations went to fetch the fire. As it was
barely alight, some oil was poured on it, and suddenly a flame arose
lighting up the great wall of rock from summit to base. An Indian who was
leaning over the brazier rose upright, his two hands in the air, his
elbows bent, and all at once we saw arising, all black on the immense
white cliff, a colossal shadow, the shadow of Buddha in his hieratic
posture. And the little pointed toque that the man wore on his head even
looked like the head-dress of the god.
The effect was so striking and unexpected that I felt my heart beat as
though some supernatural apparition had risen up before me.
That was just what it was—the ancient and sacred image, come from
the heart of the East to the ends of Europe, and watching over its son
whom they were going to cremate there.
It vanished. They brought fire. The shavings on top of the pyre were
lighted and then the wood caught fire and a brilliant light illumined the
cliff, the shingle and the foam of the waves as they broke on the beach.
It grew brighter from second to second, lighting up on the sea in the
distance the dancing crest of the waves.
The breeze from the ocean blew in gusts, increasing the heat of the flame
which flattened down, twisted, then shot up again, throwing out millions
of sparks. They mounted with wild rapidity along the cliff and were lost
in the sky, mingling with the stars, increasing their number. Some sea
birds who had awakened uttered their plaintive cry, and, describing long
curves, flew, with their white wings extended, through the gleam from the
funeral pyre and then disappeared in the night.
Before long the pile of wood was nothing but a mass of flame, not red but
yellow, a blinding yellow, a furnace lashed by the wind. And, suddenly,
beneath a stronger gust, it tottered, partially crumbling as it leaned
towards the sea, and the corpse came to view, full length, blackened on
his couch of flame and burning with long blue flames:
The pile of wood having crumbled further on the right the corpse turned
over as a man does in bed. They immediately covered him with fresh wood
and the fire started up again more furiously than ever.
The East Indians, seated in a semi-circle on the shingle, looked out with
sad, serious faces. And the rest of us, as it was very cold, had drawn
nearer to the fire until the smoke and sparks came in our faces. There
was no odor save that of burning pine and petroleum.
Hours passed; day began to break. Toward five o'clock in the morning
nothing remained but a heap of ashes. The relations gathered them up,
cast some of them to the winds, some in the sea, and kept some in a brass
vase that they had brought from India. They then retired to their home to
give utterance to lamentations.
These young princes and their servants, by the employment of the most
inadequate appliances succeeded in carrying out the cremation of their
relation in the most perfect manner, with singular skill and remarkable
dignity. Everything was done according to ritual, according to the rigid
ordinances of their religion. Their dead one rests in peace.
The following morning at daybreak there was an indescribable commotion in
Etretat. Some insisted that they had burned a man alive, others that they
were trying to hide a crime, some that the mayor would be put in jail,
others that the Indian prince had succumbed to an attack of cholera.
The men were amazed, the women indignant. A crowd of people spent the day
on the site of the funeral pile, looking for fragments of bone in the
shingle that was still warm. They found enough bones to reconstruct ten
skeletons, for the farmers on shore frequently throw their dead sheep
into the sea. The finders carefully placed these various fragments in
their pocketbooks. But not one of them possesses a true particle of the
That very night a deputy sent by the government came to hold an inquest.
He, however, formed an estimate of this singular case like a man of
intelligence and good sense. But what should he say in his report?
The East Indians declared that if they had been prevented in France from
cremating their dead they would have taken him to a freer country where
they could have carried out their customs.
Thus, I have seen a man cremated on a funeral pile, and it has given me a
wish to disappear in the same manner.
In this way everything ends at once. Man expedites the slow work of
nature, instead of delaying it by the hideous coffin in which one
decomposes for months. The flesh is dead, the spirit has fled. Fire which
purifies disperses in a few hours all that was a human being; it casts it
to the winds, converting it into air and ashes, and not into ignominious
This is clean and hygienic. Putrefaction beneath the ground in a closed
box where the body becomes like pap, a blackened, stinking pap, has about
it something repugnant and disgusting. The sight of the coffin as it
descends into this muddy hole wrings one's heart with anguish. But the
funeral pyre which flames up beneath the sky has about it something
grand, beautiful and solemn.
I was very much interested at that time in a droll little woman. She was
married, of course, as I have a horror of unmarried flirts. What
enjoyment is there in making love to a woman who belongs to nobody and
yet belongs to any one? And, besides, morality aside, I do not understand
love as a trade. That disgusts me somewhat.
The especial attraction in a married woman to a bachelor is that she
gives him a home, a sweet, pleasant home where every one takes care of
you and spoils you, from the husband to the servants. One finds
everything combined there, love, friendship, even fatherly interest, bed
and board, all, in fact, that constitutes the happiness of life, with
this incalculable advantage, that one can change one's family from time
to time, take up one's abode in all kinds of society in turn: in summer,
in the country with the workman who rents you a room in his house; in
winter with the townsfolk, or even with the nobility, if one is
I have another weakness; it is that I become attached to the husband as
well as the wife. I acknowledge even that some husbands, ordinary or
coarse as they may be, give me a feeling of disgust for their wives,
however charming they may be. But when the husband is intellectual or
charming I invariably become very much attached to him. I am careful if I
quarrel with the wife not to quarrel with the husband. In this way I have
made some of my best friends, and have also proved in many cases the
incontestable superiority of the male over the female in the human
species. The latter makes all sorts of trouble-scenes, reproaches, etc.;
while the former, who has just as good a right to complain, treats you,
on the contrary, as though you were the special Providence of his hearth.
Well, my friend was a quaint little woman, a brunette, fanciful,
capricious, pious, superstitious, credulous as a monk, but charming. She
had a way of kissing one that I never saw in any one else—but that
was not the attraction—and such a soft skin! It gave me intense
delight merely to hold her hands. And an eye—her glance was like a
slow caress, delicious and unending. Sometimes I would lean my head on
her knee and we would remain motionless, she leaning over me with that
subtle, enigmatic, disturbing smile that women have, while my eyes would
be raised to hers, drinking sweetly and deliciously into my heart, like a
form of intoxication, the glance of her limpid blue eyes, limpid as
though they were full of thoughts of love, and blue as though they were a
heaven of delights.
Her husband, inspector of some large public works, was frequently away
from home and left us our evenings free. Sometimes I spent them with her
lounging on the divan with my forehead on one of her knees; while on the
other lay an enormous black cat called "Misti," whom she adored. Our
fingers would meet on the cat's back and would intertwine in her soft
silky fur. I felt its warm body against my cheek, trembling with its
eternal purring, and occasionally a paw would reach out and place on my
mouth, or my eyelid, five unsheathed claws which would prick my eyelids,
and then be immediately withdrawn.
Sometimes we would go out on what we called our escapades. They were very
innocent, however. They consisted in taking supper at some inn in the
suburbs, or else, after dining at her house or at mine, in making the
round of the cheap cafes, like students out for a lark.
We would go into the common drinking places and take our seats at the end
of the smoky den on two rickety chairs, at an old wooden table. A cloud
of pungent smoke, with which blended an odor of fried fish from dinner,
filled the room. Men in smocks were talking in loud tones as they drank
their petits verres, and the astonished waiter placed before us two
She, trembling, charmingly afraid, would raise her double black veil as
far as her nose, and then take up her glass with the enjoyment that one
feels at doing something delightfully naughty. Each cherry she swallowed
made her feel as if she had done something wrong, each swallow of the
burning liquor had on her the affect of a delicate and forbidden
Then she would say to me in a low tone: "Let us go." And we would leave,
she walking quickly with lowered head between the drinkers who watched
her going by with a look of displeasure. And as soon as we got into the
street she would give a great sigh of relief, as if we had escaped some
Sometimes she would ask me with a shudder:
"Suppose they, should say something rude to me in those places, what
would you do?" "Why, I would defend you, parbleu!" I would reply in a
resolute manner. And she would squeeze my arm for happiness, perhaps with
a vague wish that she might be insulted and protected, that she might see
men fight on her account, even those men, with me!
One evening as we sat at a table in a tavern at Montmartre, we saw an old
woman in tattered garments come in, holding in her hand a pack of dirty
cards. Perceiving a lady, the old woman at once approached us and offered
to tell my friend's fortune. Emma, who in her heart believed in
everything, was trembling with longing and anxiety, and she made a place
beside her for the old woman.
The latter, old, wrinkled, her eyes with red inflamed rings round them,
and her mouth without a single tooth in it, began to deal her dirty cards
on the table. She dealt them in piles, then gathered them up, and then
dealt them out again, murmuring indistinguishable words. Emma, turning
pale, listened with bated breath, gasping with anxiety and curiosity.
The fortune-teller broke silence. She predicted vague happenings:
happiness and children, a fair young man, a voyage, money, a lawsuit, a
dark man, the return of some one, success, a death. The mention of this
death attracted the younger woman's attention. "Whose death? When? In
The old woman replied: "Oh, as to that, these cards are not certain
enough. You must come to my place to-morrow; I will tell you about it
with coffee grounds which never make a mistake."
Emma turned anxiously to me:
"Say, let us go there to-morrow. Oh, please say yes. If not, you cannot
imagine how worried I shall be."
I began to laugh.
"We will go if you wish it, dearie."
The old woman gave us her address. She lived on the sixth floor, in a
wretched house behind the Buttes-Chaumont. We went there the following
Her room, an attic containing two chairs and a bed, was filled with
strange objects, bunches of herbs hanging from nails, skins of animals,
flasks and phials containing liquids of various colors. On the table a
stuffed black cat looked out of eyes of glass. He seemed like the demon
of this sinister dwelling.
Emma, almost fainting with emotion, sat down on a chair and exclaimed:
"Oh, dear, look at that cat; how like it is to Misti."
And she explained to the old woman that she had a cat "exactly like that,
exactly like that!"
The old woman replied gravely:
"If you are in love with a man, you must not keep it."
Emma, suddenly filled with fear, asked:
The old woman sat down familiarly beside her and took her hand.
"It was the undoing of my life," she said.
My friend wanted to hear about it. She leaned against the old woman,
questioned her, begged her to tell. At length the woman agreed to do so.
"I loved that cat," she said, "as one would love a brother. I was young
then and all alone, a seamstress. I had only him, Mouton. One of the
tenants had given it to me. He was as intelligent as a child, and gentle
as well, and he worshiped me, my dear lady, he worshiped me more than one
does a fetish. All day long he would sit on my lap purring, and all night
long on my pillow; I could feel his heart beating, in fact.
"Well, I happened to make an acquaintance, a fine young man who was
working in a white-goods house. That went on for about three months on a
footing of mere friendship. But you know one is liable to weaken, it may
happen to any one, and, besides, I had really begun to love him. He was
so nice, so nice, and so good. He wanted us to live together, for
economy's sake. I finally allowed him to come and see me one evening. I
had not made up my mind to anything definite; oh, no! But I was pleased
at the idea that we should spend an hour together.
"At first he behaved very well, said nice things to me that made my heart
go pit-a-pat. And then he kissed me, madame, kissed me as one does when
they love. I remained motionless, my eyes closed, in a paroxysm of
happiness. But, suddenly, I felt him start violently and he gave a
scream, a scream that I shall never forget. I opened my eyes and saw that
Mouton had sprung at his face and was tearing the skin with his claws as
if it had been a linen rag. And the blood was streaming down like rain,
"I tried to take the cat away, but he held on tight, scratching all the
time; and he bit me, he was so crazy. I finally got him and threw him out
of the window, which was open, for it was summer.
"When I began to bathe my poor friend's face, I noticed that his eyes
were destroyed, both his eyes!
"He had to go to the hospital. He died of grief at the end of a year. I
wanted to keep him with me and provide for him, but he would not agree to
it. One would have supposed that he hated me after the occurrence.
"As for Mouton, his back was broken by the fall, The janitor picked up
his body. I had him stuffed, for in spite of all I was fond of him. If he
acted as he did it was because he loved me, was it not?"
The old woman was silent and began to stroke the lifeless animal whose
body trembled on its iron framework.
Emma, with sorrowful heart, had forgotten about the predicted
death—or, at least, she did not allude to it again, and she left,
giving the woman five francs.
As her husband was to return the following day, I did not go to the house
for several days. When I did go I was surprised at not seeing Misti. I
asked where he was.
She blushed and replied:
"I gave him away. I was uneasy."
I was astonished.
"Uneasy? Uneasy? What about?"
She gave me a long kiss and said in a low tone:
"I was uneasy about your eyes, my dear."
Misti appeared in. Gil Blas of January 22, 1884, over the signature
Crazy people attract me. They live in a mysterious land of weird dreams,
in that impenetrable cloud of dementia where all that they have witnessed
in their previous life, all they have loved, is reproduced for them in an
imaginary existence, outside of all laws that govern the things of this
life and control human thought.
For them there is no such thing as the impossible, nothing is improbable;
fairyland is a constant quantity and the supernatural quite familiar. The
old rampart, logic; the old wall, reason; the old main stay of thought,
good sense, break down, fall and crumble before their imagination, set
free and escaped into the limitless realm of fancy, and advancing with
fabulous bounds, and nothing can check it. For them everything happens,
and anything may happen. They make no effort to conquer events, to
overcome resistance, to overturn obstacles. By a sudden caprice of their
flighty imagination they become princes, emperors, or gods, are possessed
of all the wealth of the world, all the delightful things of life, enjoy
all pleasures, are always strong, always beautiful, always young, always
beloved! They, alone, can be happy in this world; for, as far as they are
concerned, reality does not exist. I love to look into their wandering
intelligence as one leans over an abyss at the bottom of which seethes a
foaming torrent whose source and destination are both unknown.
But it is in vain that we lean over these abysses, for we shall never
discover the source nor the destination of this water. After all, it is
only water, just like what is flowing in the sunlight, and we shall learn
nothing by looking at it.
It is likewise of no use to ponder over the intelligence of crazy people,
for their most weird notions are, in fact, only ideas that are already
known, which appear strange simply because they are no longer under the
restraint of reason. Their whimsical source surprises us because we do
not see it bubbling up. Doubtless the dropping of a little stone into the
current was sufficient to cause these ebullitions. Nevertheless crazy
people attract me and I always return to them, drawn in spite of myself
by this trivial mystery of dementia.
One day as I was visiting one of the asylums the physician who was my
"Come, I will show you an interesting case."
And he opened the door of a cell where a woman of about forty, still
handsome, was seated in a large armchair, looking persistently at her
face in a little hand mirror.
As soon as she saw us she rose to her feet, ran to the other end of the
room, picked up a veil that lay on a chair, wrapped it carefully round
her face, then came back, nodding her head in reply to our greeting.
"Well," said the doctor, "how are you this morning?"
She gave a deep sigh.
"Oh, ill, monsieur, very ill. The marks are increasing every day."
He replied in a tone of conviction:
"Oh, no; oh, no; I assure you that you are mistaken."
She drew near to him and murmured:
"No. I am certain of it. I counted ten pittings more this morning, three
on the right cheek, four on the left cheek, and three on the forehead. It
is frightful, frightful! I shall never dare to let any one see me, not
even my son; no, not even him! I am lost, I am disfigured forever."
She fell back in her armchair and began to sob.
The doctor took a chair, sat down beside her, and said soothingly in a
"Come, let me see; I assure you it is nothing. With a slight
cauterization I will make it all disappear."
She shook her head in denial, without speaking. He tried to touch her
veil, but she seized it with both hands so violently that her fingers
went through it.
He continued to reason with her and reassure her.
"Come, you know very well that I remove those horrid pits every time and
that there is no trace of them after I have treated them. If you do not
let me see them I cannot cure you."
"I do not mind your seeing them," she murmured, "but I do not know that
gentleman who is with you."
"He is a doctor also, who can give you better care than I can."
She then allowed her face to be uncovered, but her dread, her emotion,
her shame at being seen brought a rosy flush to her face and her neck,
down to the collar of her dress. She cast down her eyes, turned her face
aside, first to the right; then to the left, to avoid our gaze and
"Oh, it is torture to me to let myself be seen like this! It is horrible,
is it not? Is it not horrible?"
I looked at her in much surprise, for there was nothing on her face, not
a mark, not a spot, not a sign of one, nor a scar.
She turned towards me, her eyes still lowered, and said:
"It was while taking care of my son that I caught this fearful disease,
monsieur. I saved him, but I am disfigured. I sacrificed my beauty to
him, to my poor child. However, I did my duty, my conscience is at rest.
If I suffer it is known only to God."
The doctor had drawn from his coat pocket a fine water-color paint brush.
"Let me attend to it," he said, "I will put it all right."
She held out her right cheek, and he began by touching it lightly with
the brush here and there, as though he were putting little points of
paint on it. He did the same with the left cheek, then with the chin, and
the forehead, and then exclaimed:
"See, there is nothing there now, nothing at all!"
She took up the mirror, gazed at her reflection with profound, eager
attention, with a strong mental effort to discover something, then she
"No. It hardly shows at all. I am infinitely obliged to you."
The doctor had risen. He bowed to her, ushered me out and followed me,
and, as soon as he had locked the door, said:
"Here is the history of this unhappy woman."
Her name is Mme. Hermet. She was once very beautiful, a great coquette,
very much beloved and very much in-love with life.
She was one of those women who have nothing but their beauty and their
love of admiration to sustain, guide or comfort them in this life. The
constant anxiety to retain her freshness, the care of her complexion, of
her hands, her teeth, of every portion of body that was visible, occupied
all her time and all her attention.
She became a widow, with one son. The boy was brought up as are all
children of society beauties. She was, however, very fond of him.
He grew up, and she grew older. Whether she saw the fatal crisis
approaching, I cannot say. Did she, like so many others, gaze for hours
and hours at her skin, once so fine, so transparent and free from
blemish, now beginning to shrivel slightly, to be crossed with a thousand
little lines, as yet imperceptible, that will grow deeper day by day,
month by month? Did she also see slowly, but surely, increasing traces of
those long wrinkles on the forehead, those slender serpents that nothing
can check? Did she suffer the torture, the abominable torture of the
mirror, the little mirror with the silver handle which one cannot make up
one's mind to lay down on the table, but then throws down in disgust only
to take it up again in order to look more closely, and still more closely
at the hateful and insidious approaches of old age? Did she shut herself
up ten times, twenty times a day, leaving her friends chatting in the
drawing-room, and go up to her room where, under the protection of bolts
and bars, she would again contemplate the work of time on her ripe
beauty, now beginning to wither, and recognize with despair the gradual
progress of the process which no one else had as yet seemed to perceive,
but of which she, herself, was well aware. She knows where to seek the
most serious, the gravest traces of age. And the mirror, the little round
hand-glass in its carved silver frame, tells her horrible things; for it
speaks, it seems to laugh, it jeers and tells her all that is going to
occur, all the physical discomforts and the atrocious mental anguish she
will suffer until the day of her death, which will be the day of her
Did she weep, distractedly, on her knees, her forehead to the ground, and
pray, pray, pray to Him who thus slays his creatures and gives them youth
only that he may render old age more unendurable, and lends them beauty
only that he may withdraw it almost immediately? Did she pray to Him,
imploring Him to do for her what He has never yet done for any one, to
let her retain until her last day her charm, her freshness and her
gracefulness? Then, finding that she was imploring in vain an inflexible
Unknown who drives on the years, one after another, did she roll on the
carpet in her room, knocking her head against the furniture and stifling
in her throat shrieks of despair?
Doubtless she suffered these tortures, for this is what occurred:
One day (she was then thirty-five) her son aged fifteen, fell ill.
He took to his bed without any one being able to determine the cause or
nature of his illness.
His tutor, a priest, watched beside him and hardly ever left him, while
Mme. Hermet came morning and evening to inquire how he was.
She would come into the room in the morning in her night wrapper,
smiling, all powdered and perfumed, and would ask as she entered the
"Well, George, are you better?"
The big boy, his face red, swollen and showing the ravages of fever,
"Yes, little mother, a little better."
She would stay in the room a few seconds, look at the bottles of
medicine, and purse her lips as if she were saying "phew," and then would
suddenly exclaim: "Oh, I forgot something very important," and would run
out of the room leaving behind her a fragrance of choice toilet perfumes.
In the evening she would appear in a decollete dress, in a still greater
hurry, for she was always late, and she had just time to inquire:
"Well, what does the doctor say?"
The priest would reply:
"He has not yet given an opinion, madame."
But one evening the abbe replied: "Madame, your son has got the
She uttered a scream of terror and fled from the room.
When her maid came to her room the following morning she noticed at once
a strong odor of burnt sugar, and she found her mistress, with wide-open
eyes, her face pale from lack of sleep, and shivering with terror in her
As soon as the shutters were opened Mme. Herrnet asked:
"How is George?"
"Oh, not at all well to-day, madame."
She did not rise until noon, when she ate two eggs with a cup of tea, as
if she herself had been ill, and then she went out to a druggist's to
inquire about prophylactic measures against the contagion of small-pox.
She did not come home until dinner time, laden with medicine bottles, and
shut herself up at once in her room, where she saturated herself with
The priest was waiting for her in the dining-room. As soon as she saw him
she exclaimed in a voice full of emotion:
"No improvement. The doctor is very anxious:"
She began to cry and could eat nothing, she was so worried.
The next day, as soon as it was light, she sent to inquire for her son,
but there was no improvement and she spent the whole day in her room,
where little braziers were giving out pungent odors. Her maid said also
that you could hear her sighing all the evening.
She spent a whole week in this manner, only going out for an hour or two
during the afternoon to breathe the air.
She now sent to make inquiries every hour, and would sob when the reports
On the morning of the eleventh day the priest, having been announced,
entered her room, his face grave and pale, and said, without taking the
chair she offered him:
"Madame, your son is very ill and wishes to see you."
She fell on her knees, exclaiming:
"Oh, my God! Oh, my God! I would never dare! My God! My God! Help me!"
The priest continued:
"The doctor holds out little hope, madame, and George is expecting you!"
And he left the room.
Two hours later as the young lad, feeling himself dying, again asked for
his mother, the abbe went to her again and found her still on her knees,
still weeping and repeating:
"I will not . . . . I will not. . . . I am too much afraid . . . . I will
not. . . ."
He tried to persuade her, to strengthen her, to lead her. He only
succeeded in bringing on an attack of "nerves" that lasted some time and
caused her to shriek.
The doctor when he came in the evening was told of this cowardice and
declared that he would bring her in himself, of her own volition, or by
force. But after trying all manner of argument and just as he seized her
round the waist to carry her into her son's room, she caught hold of the
door and clung to it so firmly that they could not drag her away. Then
when they let go of her she fell at the feet of the doctor, begging his
forgiveness and acknowledging that she was a wretched creature. And then
she exclaimed: "Oh, he is not going to die; tell me that he is not going
to die, I beg of you; tell him that I love him, that I worship him. . ."
The young lad was dying. Feeling that he had only a few moments more to
live, he entreated that his mother be persuaded to come and bid him a
last farewell. With that sort of presentiment that the dying sometimes
have, he had understood, had guessed all, and he said: "If she is afraid
to come into the room, beg her just to come on the balcony as far as my
window so that I may see her, at least, so that I may take a farewell
look at her, as I cannot kiss her."
The doctor and the abbe, once more, went together to this woman and
assured her: "You will run no risk, for there will be a pane of glass
between you and him."
She consented, covered up her head, and took with her a bottle of
smelling salts. She took three steps on the balcony; then, all at once,
hiding her face in her hands, she moaned: "No . . . no . . . I would
never dare to look at him . . . never. . . . I am too much ashamed . . .
too much afraid . . . . No . . . I cannot."
They endeavored to drag her along, but she held on with both hands to the
railings and uttered such plaints that the passers-by in the street
raised their heads. And the dying boy waited, his eyes turned towards
that window, waited to die until he could see for the last time the
sweet, beloved face, the worshiped face of his mother.
He waited long, and night came on. Then he turned over with his face to
the wall and was silent.
When day broke he was dead. The day following she was crazy.
THE MAGIC COUCH
The Seine flowed past my house, without a ripple on its surface, and
gleaming in the bright morning sunlight. It was a beautiful, broad,
indolent silver stream, with crimson lights here and there; and on the
opposite side of the river were rows of tall trees that covered all the
bank with an immense wall of verdure.
The sensation of life which is renewed each day, of fresh, happy, loving
life trembled in the leaves, palpitated in the air, was mirrored in the
The postman had just brought my papers, which were handed to me, and I
walked slowly to the river bank in order to read them.
In the first paper I opened I noticed this headline, "Statistics of
Suicides," and I read that more than 8,500 persons had killed themselves
in that year.
In a moment I seemed to see them! I saw this voluntary and hideous
massacre of the despairing who were weary of life. I saw men bleeding,
their jaws fractured, their skulls cloven, their breasts pierced by a
bullet, slowly dying, alone in a little room in a hotel, giving no
thought to their wound, but thinking only of their misfortunes.
I saw others seated before a tumbler in which some matches were soaking,
or before a little bottle with a red label.
They would look at it fixedly without moving; then they would drink and
await the result; then a spasm would convulse their cheeks and draw their
lips together; their eyes would grow wild with terror, for they did not
know that the end would be preceded by so much suffering.
They rose to their feet, paused, fell over and with their hands pressed
to their stomachs they felt their internal organs on fire, their entrails
devoured by the fiery liquid, before their minds began to grow dim.
I saw others hanging from a nail in the wall, from the fastening of the
window, from a hook in the ceiling, from a beam in the garret, from a
branch of a tree amid the evening rain. And I surmised all that had
happened before they hung there motionless, their tongues hanging out of
their mouths. I imagined the anguish of their heart, their final
hesitation, their attempts to fasten the rope, to determine that it was
secure, then to pass the noose round their neck and to let themselves
I saw others lying on wretched beds, mothers with their little children,
old men dying of hunger, young girls dying for love, all rigid,
suffocated, asphyxiated, while in the center of the room the brasier
still gave forth the fumes of charcoal.
And I saw others walking at night along the deserted bridges. These were
the most sinister. The water flowed under the arches with a low sound.
They did not see it . . . they guessed at it from its cool breath! They
longed for it and they feared it. They dared not do it! And yet, they
must. A distant clock sounded the hour and, suddenly, in the vast silence
of the night, there was heard the splash of a body falling into the
river, a scream or two, the sound of hands beating the water, and all was
still. Sometimes, even, there was only the sound of the falling body when
they had tied their arms down or fastened a stone to their feet. Oh, the
poor things, the poor things, the poor things, how I felt their anguish,
how I died in their death! I went through all their wretchedness; I
endured in one hour all their tortures. I knew all the sorrows that had
led them to this, for I know the deceitful infamy of life, and no one has
felt it more than I have.
How I understood them, these who weak, harassed by misfortune, having
lost those they loved, awakened from the dream of a tardy compensation,
from the illusion of another existence where God will finally be just,
after having been ferocious, and their minds disabused of the mirages of
happiness, have given up the fight and desire to put an end to this
ceaseless tragedy, or this shameful comedy.
Suicide! Why, it is the strength of those whose strength is exhausted,
the hope of those who no longer believe, the sublime courage of the
conquered! Yes, there is at least one door to this life we can always
open and pass through to the other side. Nature had an impulse of pity;
she did not shut us up in prison. Mercy for the despairing!
As for those who are simply disillusioned, let them march ahead with free
soul and quiet heart. They have nothing to fear since they may take their
leave; for behind them there is always this door that the gods of our
illusions cannot even lock.
I thought of this crowd of suicides: more than eight thousand five
hundred in one year. And it seemed to me that they had combined to send
to the world a prayer, to utter a cry of appeal, to demand something that
should come into effect later when we understood things better. It seemed
to me that all these victims, their throats cut, poisoned, hung,
asphyxiated, or drowned, all came together, a frightful horde, like
citizens to the polls, to say to society:
"Grant us, at least, a gentle death! Help us to die, you who will not
help us to live! See, we are numerous, we have the right to speak in
these days of freedom, of philosophic independence and of popular
suffrage. Give to those who renounce life the charity of a death that
will not be repugnant nor terrible."
I began to dream, allowing my fancy to roam at will in weird and
mysterious fashion on this subject.
I seemed to be all at once in a beautiful city. It was Paris; but at what
period? I walked about the streets, looking at the houses, the theaters,
the public buildings, and presently found myself in a square where I
remarked a large building; very handsome, dainty and attractive. I was
surprised on reading on the facade this inscription in letters of gold,
Oh, the weirdness of waking dreams where the spirit soars into a world of
unrealities and possibilities! Nothing astonishes one, nothing shocks
one; and the unbridled fancy makes no distinction between the comic and
I approached the building where footmen in knee-breeches were seated in
the vestibule in front of a cloak-room as they do at the entrance of a
I entered out of curiosity. One of the men rose and said:
"What does monsieur wish?"
"I wish to know what building this is."
"Then would monsieur like me to take him to the Secretary of the Bureau?"
I hesitated, and asked:
"But will not that disturb him?"
"Oh, no, monsieur, he is here to receive those who desire information."
"Well, lead the way."
He took me through corridors where old gentlemen were chatting, and
finally led me into a beautiful office, somewhat somber, furnished
throughout in black wood. A stout young man with a corporation was
writing a letter as he smoked a cigar, the fragrance of which gave
evidence of its quality.
He rose. We bowed to each other, and as soon as the footman had retired
"What can I do for you?"
"Monsieur," I replied, "pardon my curiosity. I had never seen this
establishment. The few words inscribed on the facade filled me with
astonishment, and I wanted to know what was going on here."
He smiled before replying, then said in a low tone with a complacent air:
"Mon Dieu, monsieur, we put to death in a cleanly and gentle—I do
not venture to say agreeable manner those persons who desire to die."
I did not feel very shocked, for it really seemed to me natural and
right. What particularly surprised me was that on this planet, with its
low, utilitarian, humanitarian ideals, selfish and coercive of all true
freedom, any one should venture on a similar enterprise, worthy of an
"How did you get the idea?" I asked.
"Monsieur," he replied, "the number of suicides increased so enormously
during the five years succeeding the world exposition of 1889 that some
measures were urgently needed. People killed themselves in the streets,
at fetes, in restaurants, at the theater, in railway carriages, at the
receptions held by the President of the Republic, everywhere. It was not
only a horrid sight for those who love life, as I do, but also a bad
example for children. Hence it became necessary to centralize suicides."
"What caused this suicidal epidemic?"
"I do not know. The fact is, I believe, the world is growing old. People
begin to see things clearly and they are getting disgruntled. It is the
same to-day with destiny as with the government, we have found out what
it is; people find that they are swindled in every direction, and they
just get out of it all. When one discovers that Providence lies, cheats,
robs, deceives human beings just as a plain Deputy deceives his
constituents, one gets angry, and as one cannot nominate a fresh
Providence every three months as we do with our privileged
representatives, one just gets out of the whole thing, which is decidedly
"Oh, as for me, I am not complaining."
"Will you inform me how you carry on this establishment?"
"With pleasure. You may become a member when you please. It is a club."
"Yes, monsieur, founded by the most eminent men in the country, by men of
the highest intellect and brightest intelligence. And," he added,
laughing heartily, "I swear to you that every one gets a great deal of
enjoyment out of it."
"In this place?"
"Yes, in this place."
"You surprise me."
"Mon Dieu, they enjoy themselves because they have not that fear of death
which is the great killjoy in all our earthly pleasures."
"But why should they be members of this club if they do not kill
"One may be a member of the club without being obliged for that reason to
"I will explain. In view of the enormous increase in suicides, and of the
hideous spectacle they presented, a purely benevolent society was formed
for the protection of those in despair, which placed at their disposal
the facilities for a peaceful, painless, if not unforeseen death."
"Who can have authorized such an institution?"
"General Boulanger during his brief tenure of power. He could never
refuse anything. However, that was the only good thing he did. Hence, a
society was formed of clear-sighted, disillusioned skeptics who desired
to erect in the heart of Paris a kind of temple dedicated to the contempt
for death. This place was formerly a dreaded spot that no one ventured to
approach. Then its founders, who met together here, gave a grand
inaugural entertainment with Mmes. Sarah Bernhardt, Judic, Theo, Granier,
and twenty others, and Mme. de Reske, Coquelin, Mounet-Sully, Paulus,
etc., present, followed by concerts, the comedies of Dumas, of Meilhac,
Halevy and Sardon. We had only one thing to mar it, one drama by Becque
which seemed sad, but which subsequently had a great success at the
Comedie-Francaise. In fact all Paris came. The enterprise was launched."
"In the midst of the festivities! What a funereal joke!"
"Not at all. Death need not be sad, it should be a matter of
indifference. We made death cheerful, crowned it with flowers, covered it
with perfume, made it easy. One learns to aid others through example; one
can see that it is nothing."
"I can well understand that they should come to the entertainments; but
did they come to . . . Death?"
"Not at first; they were afraid."
"Many of them?"
"In crowds. We have had more than forty in a day. One finds hardly any
more drowned bodies in the Seine."
"Who was the first?"
"A club member."
"As a sacrifice to the cause?"
"I don't think so. A man who was sick of everything, a 'down and out' who
had lost heavily at baccarat for three months."
"The second was an Englishman, an eccentric. We then advertised in the
papers, we gave an account of our methods, we invented some attractive
instances. But the great impetus was given by poor people."
"How do you go to work?"
"Would you like to see? I can explain at the same time."
He took his hat, opened the door, allowed me to precede him, and we
entered a card room, where men sat playing as they, play in all gambling
places. They were chatting cheerfully, eagerly. I have seldom seen such a
jolly, lively, mirthful club.
As I seemed surprised, the secretary said:
"Oh, the establishment has an unheard of prestige. All the smart people
all over the world belong to it so as to appear as though they held death
in scorn. Then, once they get here, they feel obliged to be cheerful that
they may not appear to be afraid. So they joke and laugh and talk
flippantly, they are witty and they become so. At present it is certainly
the most frequented and the most entertaining place in Paris. The women
are even thinking of building an annex for themselves."
"And, in spite of all this, you have many suicides in the house?"
"As I said, about forty or fifty a day. Society people are rare, but poor
devils abound. The middle class has also a large contingent.
"And how . . . do they do?"
"They are asphyxiated . . . very slowly."
"In what manner?"
"A gas of our own invention. We have the patent. On the other side of the
building are the public entrances—three little doors opening on
small streets. When a man or a woman present themselves they are
interrogated. Then they are offered assistance, aid, protection. If a
client accepts, inquiries are made; and sometimes we have saved their
"Where do you get your money?"
"We have a great deal. There are a large number of shareholders. Besides
it is fashionable to contribute to the establishment. The names of the
donors are published in Figaro. Then the suicide of every rich man costs
a thousand francs. And they look as if they were lying in state. It costs
the poor nothing."
"How can you tell who is poor?"
"Oh, oh, monsieur, we can guess! And, besides, they must bring a
certificate of indigency from the commissary of police of their district.
If you knew how distressing it is to see them come in! I visited their
part of our building once only, and I will never go again. The place
itself is almost as good as this part, almost as luxurious and
comfortable; but they themselves . . . they themselves!!! If you could
see them arriving, the old men in rags coming to die; persons who have
been dying of misery for months, picking up their food at the edges of
the curbstone like dogs in the street; women in rags, emaciated, sick,
paralyzed, incapable of making a living, who say to us after they have
told us their story: 'You see that things cannot go on like that, as I
cannot work any longer or earn anything.' I saw one woman of eighty-seven
who had lost all her children and grandchildren, and who for the last six
weeks had been sleeping out of doors. It made me ill to hear of it. Then
we have so many different cases, without counting those who say nothing,
but simply ask: 'Where is it?' These are admitted at once and it is all
over in a minute."
With a pang at my heart I repeated:
"And . . . where is it?"
"Here," and he opened a door, adding:
"Go in; this is the part specially reserved for club members, and the one
least used. We have so far had only eleven annihilations here."
"Ah! You call that an . . . annihilation!"
"Yes, monsieur. Go in."
I hesitated. At length I went in. It was a wide corridor, a sort of
greenhouse in which panes of glass of pale blue, tender pink and delicate
green gave the poetic charm of landscapes to the inclosing walls. In this
pretty salon there were divans, magnificent palms, flowers, especially
roses of balmy fragrance, books on the tables, the Revue des Deuxmondes,
cigars in government boxes, and, what surprised me, Vichy pastilles in a
As I expressed my surprise, my guide said:
"Oh, they often come here to chat." He continued: "The public corridors
are similar, but more simply furnished."
In reply to a question of mine, he pointed to a couch covered with creamy
crepe de Chine with white embroidery, beneath a large shrub of unknown
variety at the foot of which was a circular bed of mignonette.
The secretary added in a lower tone:
"We change the flower and the perfume at will, for our gas, which is
quite imperceptible, gives death the fragrance of the suicide's favorite
flower. It is volatilized with essences. Would you like to inhale it for
"'No, thank you," I said hastily, "not yet . . . ."
He began to laugh.
"Oh, monsieur, there is no danger. I have tried it myself several times."
I was afraid he would think me a coward, and I said:
"Well, I'll try it."
"Stretch yourself out on the 'endormeuse."'
A little uneasy I seated myself on the low couch covered with crepe de
Chine and stretched myself full length, and was at once bathed in a
delicious odor of mignonette. I opened my mouth in order to breathe it
in, for my mind had already become stupefied and forgetful of the past
and was a prey, in the first stages of asphyxia, to the enchanting
intoxication of a destroying and magic opium.
Some one shook me by the arm.
"Oh, oh, monsieur," said the secretary, laughing, "it looks to me as if
you were almost caught."
But a voice, a real voice, and no longer a dream voice, greeted me with
the peasant intonation:
"Good morning, m'sieu. How goes it?"
My dream was over. I saw the Seine distinctly in the sunlight, and,
coming along a path, the garde champetre of the district, who with his
right hand touched his kepi braided in silver. I replied:
"Good morning, Marinel. Where are you going?"
"I am going to look at a drowned man whom they fished up near the
Morillons. Another who has thrown himself into the soup. He even took off
his trousers in order to tie his legs together with them."
his trousers in order to tie his legs together with them."