The Captain's Pudding by Unknown

The following story is told of an American captain and his mate. Whenever a plum-pudding was made, most of the plums, by the captain's orders, were put into one end of it, and that end was placed next the captain, who was rather a greedy and selfish man. The captain, after helping himself, passed it to the mate, who never found many plums in his portion.

"'You have found me out!' said the captain."

"'You have found me out!' said the captain."


After this trick had been played for some time, the mate coaxed the steward beforehand, and got him to place the plumless end next the captain. But the captain no sooner saw the pudding than he discovered that he had the wrong end of it.

Picking up the dish, he turned it about in his hands, as if examining the china.

'This dish,' he said, in a casual manner, 'cost me three shillings in Liverpool.' With these words he put down the dish, with the 'plummy' end of the pudding turned towards himself.

'Really,' said the mate, in his turn lifting the dish, 'I should not have thought it worth more than a shilling.'

Then, with apparent carelessness, he put down the pudding, with the plums towards himself.

The two men looked at one another. The captain laughed. The mate laughed.

'You have found me out!' said the captain. 'Well, we will cut the pudding lengthwise, and in future the plums shall be fairly distributed.'